Date: Tue, 06 Jun 2000 07:55:02 -0700
From: Fred Sperry <fbsperry2@yahoo.com>
Subject: SUMMERTIME GIRL

This story contains no sex or violence, unless you consider getting spanked
an act of violence.  It is the story of how a little "boy" came to decide
that he didn't want to be a boy.


When I was twelve years old, it was decided that I would spend my summers
with Aunt Jane and her family.  Aunt Jane had a big old place in Farmdale
County that had been in her family since the time began.  The farm had long
since been sold off into house lots, but Aunt Jane still had the house, the
barn, and enough land for a huge lawn and garden.

 Aunt Jane was big. She was almost six feet tall and built like a man.  Her
whole family was big.  Her son Rick was sixteen and he was almost as big.
His sister Mary was my age but she was a lot bigger and stronger than I
was.  I liked to play with play with her when they visited the city.

Motor and I weren't midgets, but we were little people.  She was just under
five feet tall, and I was a lot shorter than that.. Mother said that little
people should mind their manners and stay out of the way of big people. She
said we should never be first in line, never speak out or draw attention to
ourselves and NEVER EVER fight back. I had blue eyes and thick blond hair
that my mother had cut like a Dutch boy.  If you have ever seen a picture
of the little kid with his finger in the dike, that was me.  My mother
bought all my clothes and tended to get things that made me look like the
cute little boy she wanted me to be rather than the tough little kid she
was afraid I'd be. She said little people should try to look cute and sweet
not strong or macho.  Strong and macho was for big people.

I didn't like the boys in my neighborhood.  They were rough and mean, not
just to me, but to everybody!  They were always knocking each other down
and wrestling just for the fun of it.  I didn't think it was fun, I always
lost.  Their favorite way of saying" hello" was to walk right up to you and
hit you in the arm.  I didn't like that either, it hurt They played rough
games like football and were always fighting with each other and getting
dirty and playing nasty tricks on people. I played with the girls and the
little kids.  Of course the big boys teased me and called me names.  I'd
cry and ran home to mother or try to hide.  What else can I do?  I didn't
like them and they didn't like me. I didn't like me very much either at
that time but there was nothing I could do about it, so I just tried to
stay away from them as much as possible.  That's what my mother wanted me
to do.  She said it was alright for little people to run away and cry,
,that's what they were supposed to do.

It was long after my bedtime when we finally arrived at Aunt Jane's house.
I went straight up to bed while my mother headed back to the city..  Rick
brought me some milk and cookies and I went right to sleep.  The next
morning when I woke up the bed was sopping wet!  I hadn't wet the bed in a
longtime, but I sure did that night.

By the time I got down stairs Rick and Mary were discussing what should be
done.  Rick thought I should get spanked but Mary said it wasn't my fault.
She had a friend whose little brother wet the bed but he was only three and
wore diapers.  Aunt Jane said she would take care of it, so they stopped
talking about it. ( I was glad they did, it was hardly my favorite topic of
conversation.)

After breakfast Mary decided she would show me the house so off we went.
The house was huge!  It had a living room, family room, dining room,
breakfast room, kitchen, pantry, bathroom, and a big front hall, all on the
first floor.  The second floor had six bed rooms and three bathrooms!  With
all those spare bed rooms I was glad I got to share one with Rick.  It
wasn't that I was really afraid of the dark or at least told myself I
wasn't. I just didn't like to sleep by myself, at home I slept in the same
room with my mother, we had a small apartment.  The third floor had two
more bed rooms and a big attic but we didn't get to see the attic.  I
needed a bathroom BADLY!  I ran down to the second floor and headed for the
nearest bathroom but I didn't make it!  I wet my pants!  It went all down
the front of me.  I was surprised, I hadn't wet my pants since I was a
baby, but what could I say?  I was embarrassed but I cleaned myself up,
changed my clothes and met Mary in her room.

 She wanted to show me her doll collection.  I liked dolls.  At home I had
a bunch of stuffed animals and a lot of hand puppets.  I did have one doll
though, it was a "G. I. Joe".  I dressed him up in different ways and
called him Rick .  He was the daddy in all the little stories I made up for
my puppets.  My daddy died when I was just a baby and I didn't remember him
and all, so sometimes I used to pretended Rick was my daddy. (I thought the
boys wouldn't pick on me if my daddy was there.) Mary had a lot of nice
dolls and a really neat doll house for them to live in.  Mary said that
Barbie was mad at Kim because he came home late last night.  I said that he
had to work late at the office but he was sorry so they should kiss and
make up.  They did, and that started it.  The next thing we knew Aunt Jane
was saying we had to put the dolls away and come down for lunch!  We had
spent the whole morning playing with dolls!  I couldn't remember when I had
so much fun.

After lunch Rick took me out to show me the barn.  It was a big spooky
place with lots of little rooms and dark corners.  We played hide and seek,
I would run and hide and he would come look for me.  When he caught me he
would tie me up and march his "prisoner" back to the base.  One time when I
was hiding I felt I needed to go to the bathroom so I crossed my legs and
giggled so Rick would find me. When I told him that I had to " go" he just
laughed and tied me up anyway.  Then he tickled me and made me laugh.  I
couldn't hold it!  I wet my pants, AGAIN!

When we got back to the house Aunt Jane said that it was almost time for
dinner so she would get me ready for bed so I could come back down , eat
and watch television.  She took me upstairs and ran my bath while I got out
on my wet clothes..  When I came into the bathroom the tub was full of
bubbles but Aunt Jane didn't leave!  She said she had seen little boys
before and wanted to be sure I got really clean.  I was surprised, at home
mother and I always took showers by ourselves. I had fun playing with the
bubbles while Aunt Jane washed me all over, she even washed my hair and
cleaned my ears.  Then she lifted me out of the tub, dried me with a big
fluffy towel and took me into the bedroom.  She sat me on a table and
commenced to pin on three big thick diapers followed by a pair of plastic
panties!  She said that we couldn't have me wetting the bed all the time. (
I wondered who "we" referred to but thought I'd better not ask.)  I didn't
like the idea of diapers, but I had wet the bed, so I didn't say anything.
The problem was my pajamas wouldn't fit! They were last years and small
anyway.  There was no way they were going to fit over those bulky diapers.
Aunt Jane said she'd take care of that problem and led me over to Mary's
room.  She said I'd have to wear one of Mary's old nightgowns.  When I
complained that I was a boy she said that George Washington wore a
nightgown and I didn't want to go down stairs with just a diaper on. ( She
had a very good point there.)  She picked a blue one to match my eyes , it
had a pink lace collar and cuffs with little white bunny rabbits all over
it.  I wasn't too happy until she showed me the cute little bunny slippers
that went with it and handed me a big white bunny rabbit. I hugged the
rabbit and decided it didn't look too bad and didn't complain when she
tried a ribbon in my hair and told me to go down stairs and show the others
how nice I looked.

Rick and Mary were thrilled.  They said that I looked really cute.  I
thought I looked like an oversized seven-year-old.  Actually Mary got that
nightgown for her seventh birthday.  She hugged me and said now I could be
her little sister.  Rick sat me on his lap, cut my meat and started to feed
me my dinner.  When I tried to say that I could feed myself he popped a
spoonful of mashed potatoes in my mouth so I couldn't say anything.  I
played the part of being his little girl and enjoyed every minute of it,
hugging that big white bunny rabbit all through dinner.

After dinner Rick and Aunt Jane watched the news while Mary and I played on
the floor.  We crawled around pretending we were babies but I was the only
one wearing a diaper!  After the news Aunt Jane took me on her lap and we
watched a movie.  Then Rick took me on his lap and we watched another show
but I didn't see very much of it.  He kept kissing my hair and tickling me.
Aunt Jane would give him a dirty look and he would stop for awhile but he
still had his hands all over me. ( Who wants to watch an old movie when
they can cuddle with cousin Rick anyway?)  By that time I was getting tired
so Rick carried me up to bed.

He gave me a glass of milk and tucked me in.  He kissed me on the forehead
and wished me goodnight.  I made him kiss my bunny goodnight and I went
straight to sleep.

The next morning I was wet but the bed wasn't, neither was my bunny.  The
diapers worked!  ( Maybe they weren't such a bad idea after all) Aunt Jane
came in, stripped off my wet diapers, pinned a new one on me and told me I
would get spanked if I took it off.  I wanted to say that I didn't need a
diaper during the day, but I had wet my pants twice the day before so I
shut up and let her do what she wanted.  Rick said that I would have to
wear a dress because it would be too hard to change my diaper with pants
on.  AUNT JANE AGREED WITH HIM!!!  She took me into Mary's room and started
to put a training bra on me!  That was too much!  I wasn't going to take
anymore!  " JESUS CHRIST !"  I screamed " I DON'T NEED ONE OF THOSE!"  She
dropped the bra, grabbed me and shouted "YOU DON'T TALK LIKE THAT AROUND
HERE, YOUNG LADY!  YOU DON'T USE THE NAME OF OUR LORD GOD IN VAIN!"  She
dragged me into the bathroom, soaped up a watch cloth and stuffed it in my
mouth!  I tried to yell and scream, but that just got more soap in my
mouth.  When I finally calmed down she washed my face and took me back to
the bedroom.  I didn't object much after that!  I could taste soap in my
mouth every time I even thought about complaining about anything.  She put
the bra on me followed by a slip and a pretty yellow sun dress with a skirt
that only came halfway to my knees!  She put little foot covers on my feet
with yellow balls on the back that poked out over the heels of the matching
yellow shoes she laced on my feet.  When we went downstairs Mary was happy
to see her little sister again.  I felt a little foolish but nobody laughed
or said anything.

After breakfast Aunt Jane fitted Mary and me with matching aprons and
little head scarfs and we became her "little helpers".  She told us we
could clean the bedrooms and make the beds.  We pretended it was a hotel
and made up stories about all the guests that were staying in the different
rooms.  While we were upstairs I needed the bathroom again.  I didn't know
what to do.  Aunt Jane had said that I'd get spanked if I took my diaper
off and I didn't think I could pin it back on anyway.  I asked Mary what to
do but she said she didn't know.  She didn't think she could pin it back on
either.  Than suddenly it didn't make any difference. I wet myself and had
to tell Aunt Jane anyway.  She wasn't mad or anything she just changed my
diaper and sent me back upstairs.  Aunt Jane told me not to be afraid to
come to her when my diaper was wet so after that I'd just wet myself and
tell Aunt Jane that I needed my diaper changed.

After lunch Aunt said she wanted the girls to play outside.  " The girls?"
Well I guess I looked like a girl but I didn't feel like one, or maybe I
did.  What did girls feel like anyway?  Mary and I went outside and handed
for the swings and slides in the backyard.  I soon learned to keep my skirt
down when I used the slide. (Keeping your skirt down is very important
especially when you're wearing a diaper and plastic panties.)  I was
pushing Mary on the swing when I heard voices behind me.  I turned around
and there were two little girls about my age!  Mary introduced them as
Ruth, who lived next door and had a little brother who wet the bed and
Susan who lived across the street.  She told them that I was her cousin Pat
who lived in the city.  She forgot to mention that my name was Patrick , so
they called me Patty or Patricia and thought I was a girl. I guess I should
have said something right than, but I didn't want to tell them that I wet
my pants, so I didn't say anything and let them go on thinking I was a
girl. We played hopscotch and jump rope and other games that I liked .
When I had to "go" I'd just wet myself and ran into the house to tell Aunt
Jane. she'd change me quickly and sand me right back outside.  Rick was
right , it was a lot easier and faster for her to change my diaper when I
was wearing a dress than it would have been if I had been wearing pants.  (
I guess wearing a dress made sense). I liked getting my diaper changed
quickly so I could go back outside and play with the girls.  It was a lot
cooler wearing a dress too, and besides, I kind of liked the way I looked
and felt.

That night at dinner I sat in my own chair.  We put books on it to raise me
up a little and I fed myself.  Rick kept Making faces at me and making me
giggle.  Aunt Jane kept saying I should sit up and act like a lady. I
thought that was funny, so I giggled some more. didn't feel like a lady, I
felt like a little girl, if that's what little girls felt like.

That night when Rick put me to bed he gave me another glass of milk.  I
made him get second one for my bunny and I drank both of them.  The next
morning I was wet but that wasn't surprising, I was wet every morning.

Mary and I made the beds up quickly and snuck up to the attic.  Mary said
it was off-limits but she would show it to me anyway.  It was a big room
filled with old furniture, boxes, trunks, and all sorts of interesting
stuff.  Mary showed me a big box that had old clothes in it.  Right on top
was a beautiful white dress.  I put it on but it was way to big for me.  It
dragged on the floor so Mary and I decided it must be a wedding dress.  She
found a man's hat and we had a wedding.  I was the bride and she was the
groom because she was wearing blue jeans and a shirt.  We strutted around
in front of an old mirror we found and had a lot of fun.  Then we found an
old makeup kit and Mary tried to put some lipstick on me .  She didn't do a
very good job, so I put a red dot on the end of her nose.  We'd both had
our faces painted before, at parties and such, but that was done by an
adult who knew what they were doing.  We got makeup and stuff all over each
other.  We were laughing and giggling when we heard Aunt Jane coming up the
stairs!

She was mad! "YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED IN HERE" she shouted.  She
grabbed Mary, took her across her knee pulled down her jeans and panties
and started smacking her bottom!  Mary began to cry and so did I because I
knew I was going to get the same thing.  When she finished with Mary she
grabbed me and said, "COME HERE YOUNG LADY! " She took my diaper off and
spanked me hard.  When she finally stopped spanking me she looked at the
two of us and started to laugh.  I guess we did look kind of funny, too
little clowns with tears running down their faces, and both clutching their
sore bottoms.

She took us downstairs, put us both in the same bathtub and cleaned us up.
I had never seen a naked girl before, but I was too busy trying to keep the
soap out of my eyes to pay much attention.  Then she dressed us. Mary got
another pair of jeans and a new shirt.  I got a pretty little white dress
with green butterflies all over it.  It didn't seem fair.  Mary always wore
jeans while I got to where all her pretty dresses.  Mary couldn't fit into
any of my dresses anyway, she'd out grown them long ago. " My dresses?"
Could I keep them?  Did I want to?  Did I like them?  Did I like wearing
them?  Questions, questions, questions.  I didn't seem to have any answers,
I was confused.

That night I hugged my bunny and told him, " I WAS A BOY", but I liked
playing girl's games."  I WAS A BOY, but I liked playing with dolls." I WAS
A BOY", but I loved my puppets." I WAS A BOY", but I kind of liked looking
like a girl.  "I WAS A BOY", but did I want to be a girl?  I cried myself
to sleep reminding myself that "I WAS A BOY"

The next day Mary said she would show me the neighborhood.  Rick found a
girl's bike I could ride and we started out.  We met lots of other kids and
some of them decided to join us on our tour of the neighborhood.  One boy
in particular, ( his name was Bobby Anderson) kept cutting in front of me.
He had jet black hair and beautiful big brown eyes.  I pretended to be mad,
but I knew he was just trying to get my attention.  When we stopped for a
rest he sat down next to me and told me that he was fourteen and was going
to be in high school next year.  He told me a lot of other stuff about
himself and kept trying to hold my hand while he did.  I kept pulling my
hand away but let him know that I'd like it if there weren't so many other
kids around.  He was nice and I liked him a lot but I didn't want the other
girls to tease me about it.  On the way back I wet my diaper but nobody
noticed and I sure wasn't going to tell them.

Just before dinner I had to do BM.!  I didn't want to do THAT in my diaper
so I snuck into the bathroom when nobody was looking and pulled down my
diaper. ( It was lose, I guess Aunt Jane didn't pin it on right.)  I was
surprised to find that I felt rather grown up, in a childish sort of away
to be sitting there alone on the toilet.  I snuck back out and nobody saw
me.  I thought I had gotten away with something, but I wasn't quite sure
what.

After dinner Aunt Jane said she wanted to see me upstairs.  She told me to
take my dress off while she did something in the bathroom.  Then she took
off my diaper and said "you haven't had a really messy diaper since you
been here.  You must be all stopped up."  She took me in the bathroom and
gave me and enema!! ( So much for getting away with something.)  Then she
gave me some medicine to take.  She said it was a laxative so I wouldn't
get all stopped up again.  Between the laxatives she gave me during the day
and the "milk" Rick gave me at night, there was no shortage of wet or
shirty diapers after that.

I HAD FIGURED IT OUT!  Somebody was putting something in my milk!  But who
was I going to tell about it?  Mary?  She was just glad to have another
girl to play with.  Aunt Jane?  She changed my diaper three or four times a
day.  She must have known that something was going on.  Rick?  He was the
one who brought me the milk at night.  What was I going to complain about
anyway?  That I had to wet a lot?  So what?  So do lots of people.  That I
had to where diapers?  I got used to them and they did work.  That I had to
where dresses?  They did make it easier to change my diaper, and I kind of
liked wearing them anyway.  I decided not to say anything.  I was having
too good at time to let a little thing like that get in the way.

The next day I saw Bobby Anderson ride by the house on his bike four times!
He would kind of wave to me with his fingers.  He didn't take his hand off
the handlebar because he didn't want the boys he was riding with to see
that he was interested in me.  I would kind of wave back to him with my
fingers.  I didn't want the other girls to see that I was interested in him
either.  It was our secret way of saying " I see you and I like you."  We
didn't want anybody else to know about it.  Mary found out I liked him but
I really didn't care. I liked Bobby, and I knew she liked Johnny Miller. I
teased her about Johnny and she teased me about Bobby so we were even.

The boys came over a lot after that and we would all play croquet together.
Aunt Jane had the only yard big enough to play croquet.  Ruth and Susan
would play too, but they didn't have boyfriends.  Susan liked Bobby's
brother Charley, but he was away and boy scout camp so he wasn't around
much.

A few weeks later Ruth and Susan came over to Aunt Jane's house all
excited. It was Ruth's birthday next Friday and her mother said she could
have a party.  We all started talking about the party, and what we would
where.  Suddenly I started to cry and ran in the house to find Aunt Jane.

When I found her she took me on her lap and wanted to know what was wrong.
I told her Ruth was going to have a party AND I COULDN'T GO!  She said of
course I could go and I'd have a wonderful time.  I sobbed that I'd have to
wear a diaper and I'd wet myself and the kids would laugh at me and Bobby
wouldn't like me anymore!  She said that we could work on that and she
didn't think I'd have to wear a diaper if I tried real hard to stay dry
between now and then.  She said I should tell her every time BEFORE I'd wet
myself.

All of a sudden I didn't get anything to drink after dinner, no milk , no
water, no fruit juice, nothing.  IT WORKED!  I was dry every morning.
During the day I stayed close to the house and made sure to tell Aunt Jane
every time I needed to "go".  I'd run in an tell her I had to "go"
sometimes when I didn't really have to, just to make sure I kept my diaper
dry.  Finally Aunt said I didn't have to where diapers anymore! (I think
she was tired on me bothering her all the time.) I asked her if I could
still wear dresses and act like a girl.  All the kids thought I was a girl
and I couldn't think of anyway to explain to them that I was really a boy,
I didn't really want to anyway.  I asked Aunt Jane if I could wear real
panties just like all the other girls and she said I could! I liked the
idea of wearing panties, and I liked pretending to be a girl.



Ruth's mother said that each of us had to invite a boy and that we girls
could sleep over after the party.  This caused a problem.  Nobody would
admit they wanted to invite a boy but we really did, so we decided to play
a game.  We got a lot of stuffed animals and placed them in a circle.  We
decided which animal would represent which boy, and then spun the bottle.
When it was my turn I made sure the bottle stopped at my big white rabbit
that was Bobby Anderson.  I noticed Susan made sure it's stopped at the dog
that was his brother Charley and Mary stopped it at the teddy bear that was
Johnny Miller.  When Ruth spun the bottle it's stopped at the cat that was
Jimmy Cline, but I don't think she cared much.

It was settled, there would be three boys and three girls and we'd play
guessing games and thing's.  Susan said we should dance at the party We
decided we'd try , but none of the rest of us knew how to dance.  I was
worried about sleeping over, but Aunt Jane said that if I was careful
nobody would know I wasn't a girl.  I wasn't really sure I wasn't a girl,
so I figured I could get away with it.

Mary and I tried on dress after dress trying to decide what to wear.
Nothing seemed right, they were all too big or to small or not the right
color or not fancy enough or had something else wrong with them.  Finally
Aunt Jane said she would take us into town and we could buy new dresses!
ME TOO! I was to have a dress of my very own, not one of Mary's old ones,
but a new one, bought just for me!  I was thrilled, I'd never had a dress
of my very own before , but I had never picked out any of my own clothes
before either.

Aunt Jane took us into town.  It was a small town, not like the big city I
was used to, but they had a nice dress shop for little girls.  Mary picked
out a pink dress with a big bow in the back.  I picked a yellow one that
matched my hair and had a skirt that swung out nicely when I spun
around. Aunt Jane even bought me a pair of real silk panties! ( Wow! they
felt really good when I put them on! ) Then she bought me a bra with pads
in it so I could have little breasts just like Mary.  Now I was really
going to look like a girl! (I wished I could be one.)

At the party we tried to dance, but Bobby couldn't dance and a better than
I could so we went outside on the porch and sat on the swing.  First his
arm was on the back of the swing, then it was on my shoulder, then he was
holding the tight and hugging me!  He kissed me on the cheek!  I'd been
kissed on the cheek lots of times, but it felt different when he did it!
Suddenly he kissed me on the mouth!  He put his tongue in my mouth!  Nobody
had ever done THAT before!  I couldn't get my breath, my emotions flew all
over the place!  I never felt anything like it before!  I liked it, in fact
I liked it very much, maybe too much!  It had to stop!  I pushed him away
and looked at him.  He had a sheepish look on his face and I knew he was
going to say he was sorry, so I kissed him before he could say anything.
This time I put my tongue in HIS mouth, and it was even more exciting!  He
was breathless, I'm sure nobody ever kissed him like that before either.
Suddenly the porch light went on!  Ruth's mother said we should come inside
and have some ice cream.  I didn't want any ice cream, but I thought we'd
better stop before we got in trouble.  I wasn't sure we weren't in trouble
already but Ruth's mother didn't say anything so I guess it was all right.

That night I changed in the bathroom and we girls stayed up late talking
about the boys.  I found out that all the other girls had gotten kissed
too, but I don't think any of them enjoyed it as much as I did.  I didn't
dare even try to tell them how I felt, that was something strictly between
Bobby and me.  I hopped he didn't tell anybody either.  I didn't think he
would, he wasn't that kind of a boy, or at least I hoped he wasn't that
kind of boy.  I loved him, or thought I did at the time.  "Loved him?"
What was love anyway? How could anybody LOVE anybody?  What did it mean?  I
loved my mother, but that was different.  How could somebody "make love"?
Could love really be made?  How did a boy love a girl?  How did a boy love
another boy?  What was a boy, anyway?  I knew boys had pricks, and I had a
prick, so I must be a boy, but I didn't feel like a boy.  I didn't like
being a boy! I didn't want to be a boy!  There were so many questions and I
was so confused.  Was wrong for a boy to love another boy?  I didn't know
and I certainly couldn't ask the other girls or Aunt Jane or anybody
else. I'd just have to find out for myself.

Aunt Jane wanted to hear all about the party and we told her most of the
things that happened.  I didn't tell her about Bobby kissing me, but Mary
told her Bobby and I spent a lot of time out on the porch alone. I think
Aunt Jane knew what happened on the porch because she said that if I wanted
to continue to pretend I was a girl I'd have to have my own room so I moved
into a room by myself.  I wasn't afraid of the dark anymore, I had my bunny
(whose name was Bobby by the way) to protect me from the dark, besides I
left a night light on so wasn't that dark anyway, and Rick still came in to
kiss me good night.

For the rest of that summer I was a girl.  I couldn't remember when I'd
been so happy.  Every night I whispered to my bunny "I WANT TO BE A GIRL!
I WANT TO BE A GIRL!  I WANT TO BE A GIRL!" Over and over until I'd fall
asleep.  I played with the girls and the boys didn't tease me.  Well, they
didn't tease me in the same way, anyhow.  Nobody hit me in the arm or
knocked me down.  Eddie Blake got mad and pushed me down once.  Bobby
Anderson hit him in the nose and they had a terrible fight!  Eddie went
home crying and I didn't see him again for the whole summer!

At the end of the summer I told Aunt Jane that I wanted to stay with her
family and be a girl.  She said that it was all a big mistake. Rick had
just wanted to play a trick on me, and had put something in my milk to make
me wet the bed. But when he saw how happy I was, sitting on his lap ,
pertaining to be his little girl, playing on the floor with Mary, and
cudgeling with him, after dinner, he decided to keep it up and had talked
her into growing along with it.  She said they never thought it would go on
all summer, or that I would really like being a girl. She said she was
sorry, but I told her not to be sorry, I loved being a girl and wanted to
keep on being one.  But I had to go to school, and my mother wanted me
home.  She knew I'd been pretending to be a girl all summer.  We'd talked
about it on the phone She didn't understand, but said she didn't mind , so
long as Aunt Jane said it was okay.

When I got back to the city I tried to be a boy, and I really tried hard.
I didn't play with the girls, and I even won the school championship in
wrestling, for my weight class.  I didn't play with the girls, but I didn't
play with the boys either, I didn't play with anybody.  After school I came
straight home and hit the books hard!.  In my spare time I played with my
computer, but I still wanted to be a girl.  I'd brought some of Mary's
clothes home with me and sometimes I'd dress up like a girl and think about
Bobby and all the good times I had that summer, while I suffered the net.

I didn't hear much from the people in Farmdale for a longtime, and then I
got a Valentine!  It was made on a computer and had a picture of a boy
riding a bicycle on the front.  Inside it said "I'LL WAVE MY FINGERS TO
YOU, WILL YOU WAVE YOUR FINGERS BACK TO ME?"and it was signed
banderson@/////.com.{Bobby's real Emile address was on the card).  I ran to
the computer so fast I almost broke my leg! After that I "talked" with
Bobby almost every night on the computer.  I told him all about what was
going on in the city and he told me about what was going on in Farmdale,
but I never told him that I was a boy, and he never asked.

For the next three years I was an unhappy little boy in the winter , and a
very happy little girl in the summer.  I saw Bobby at parties, and picnics
and other places in Farmdale, and he kissed me every time he got a chance,
which wasn't very often, we were never allowed to be alone together.  Aunt
Jane was very strict about that.  She wasn't going to let her "little girl"
get of bad reputation!  She did allow us to take dance lessons together at
the local YMCA, but we were never alone.

When Bobby seventeen he got his license, borrowed his father's car, and
wanted to take me for a ride.  Aunt Jane didn't want to let me go, but I
pleaded with her and she finally said YES! It was to be my first date! We
drove around for a while and finally Bobby parked by the lake, just where
I'd hoped he'd park.  He hugged me and kissed me the way only Bobby could
hug me and kiss me, but I was fifteen and he was seventeen and I wanted him
to do a lot more than just hug and kiss me! I wanted to do certain things
to him too!

Suddenly my frustrations overwhelmed me and I started to cry! .I sobbed out
that I wasn't really a girl!  I was just a boy, but that I really wanted to
be a girl, and that I loved him, and wanted him to love me like a girl, and
that I was scared that he'd hate me if he knew I was a boy!

 HE LAUGHED!  HE WAS HAPPY ABOUT IT!

He said he knew all along that I was a boy!  He said Mary had told him
after Ruth's birthday party years ago!  He said that I was a silly little
bunny, and should get spanked for not telling him sooner that I was a boy!
He said that he had been waiting for me to tell him that I was a boy so he
could tell me that he loved me anyway!  He said he'd love me whether I was
a boy, or girl, or an alligator, for that matter!  I looked at him and
started to cry even harder! (Why do we girls always have to cry when were
happy?) When I settled down, he told me to get in the back seat, and the
show me how much he loved me!

But that's another story.  If you have any suspicions or comments about
what might have happened in that back seat contact me at
fbsperry2@yahoo.com.