A Review by Lee Vine Amanda by ShadowCleric M/F, teen Length: 1,600+ words ========== NOTES: (1) IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!! (2) IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY DESCRIPTIONS OF NATURAL ACTS WHICH SOME PEOPLE CALL PLEASUREABLE BUT YOU REGARD AS NECESSARY FOR THE PERPETUATION OF THE HUMAN RACE THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!!! (3) IF YOU AREN'T SURE IF EITHER (1) OR (2) APPLY TO YOU THEN STOP READING NOW!!!! ========== Summary Boy and girl have been friends for a long time. Boy and girl are both on the swim team. Swim team goes to a meet in a distant town. Boy and girl take the opportunity to get buck naked and fuck. Commentary I liked this story. There was a little build up. The story gave some background. The narrator and Amanda were not in the sack from the get go. For a first attempt I thought it was a decent one. It was a little short, but the author did pace the story. The characters could have been fleshed out a little more. My advice to the author is to put these two characters in different situations, both with and without each other, and show how the sexual tension affects them before having them jump in the sack together. Rating I give this story a 6 on a scale of 10. -- Lee Vine <santiago@switchboardmail.com>