Rogue Review  No. 42 - June 1, 1998

by Lee Vine

Christine by ShadowCleric

M/F

Length: 2,900 words

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NOTES:

(1)  IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!
(2)  IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY DESCRIPTIONS OF NATURAL ACTS WHICH SOME 
PEOPLE CALL PLEASUREABLE BUT YOU REGARD AS NECESSARY FOR THE 
PERPETUATION OF THE HUMAN RACE THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!!!
(3)  IF YOU AREN'T SURE IF EITHER (1) OR (2) APPLY TO YOU THEN STOP 
READING NOW!!!!

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Summary

Dave falls for his new boss, Christine.


Commentary

This was a good effort, for a first draft.  The dialogue was good.  
The dilemma was apparent and there was some tension in this story.  
The sex scenes were of an appropriate length, just enough to give the
reader an idea of what was going on.  The characters were well done, 
although they were more types than they were fully fleshed out 
individuals.

This story read like an outline.  It was not well formatted.  The 
scenes were bunched together.  My advice to ShadowCleric is to find 
someone to help him (or her?) in completing this story.  Because I 
write reviews of stories, and not first drafts, I cannot recommend 
this one.  This does not mean that there is nothing good about this 
story, simply that it needs some work.


Judgment

This was not a good story, but the plot was well handled, as were the
characters.