Rogue Review No. 42 - June 1, 1998 by Lee Vine Christine by ShadowCleric M/F Length: 2,900 words ========== NOTES: (1) IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!! (2) IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY DESCRIPTIONS OF NATURAL ACTS WHICH SOME PEOPLE CALL PLEASUREABLE BUT YOU REGARD AS NECESSARY FOR THE PERPETUATION OF THE HUMAN RACE THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!!! (3) IF YOU AREN'T SURE IF EITHER (1) OR (2) APPLY TO YOU THEN STOP READING NOW!!!! ========== Summary Dave falls for his new boss, Christine. Commentary This was a good effort, for a first draft. The dialogue was good. The dilemma was apparent and there was some tension in this story. The sex scenes were of an appropriate length, just enough to give the reader an idea of what was going on. The characters were well done, although they were more types than they were fully fleshed out individuals. This story read like an outline. It was not well formatted. The scenes were bunched together. My advice to ShadowCleric is to find someone to help him (or her?) in completing this story. Because I write reviews of stories, and not first drafts, I cannot recommend this one. This does not mean that there is nothing good about this story, simply that it needs some work. Judgment This was not a good story, but the plot was well handled, as were the characters.