The Admission by Karen Blayne

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author.

God my dad was in yet another emergency board meeting so I wondered into Phyllis’s office, officially she’s his executive whatever these days, dad still calls her his secretary. Still I like her, she always finds time to talk to me.

She looked at me sympathetically, “Want me to interrupt with an urgent message?” I grinned and she grinned back. “No better not he’d only get all grumpy.” “Well he’s probably going to be tied up for the rest of the day, now what have you decided about University young lady?” “Nothing yet I mean that’s like more than a year away.” “Well what would you like to study?” “I hadn’t really thought about it. I was reading an article in this month’s Scientific American that looked interesting. Some guy call Dr. Roach is doing some fun stuff.” Phyllis’s eye gleamed and she walked over to the coffee table and dug out the copy I’d been reading. “This one?” “Well yes.” “Right pick up your bag and we’ll go and visit his University this afternoon whilst your father is busy.”

So we did, we took the company plane for as Phyllis said it wasn’t used very often and it did save time. Phyllis was busy working away on her lap top whilst the pilot explained the controls to me as I peeped over his shoulder. It’s only a little one so it can land practically anywhere.

We arrived on campus barely an hour later and as we walked across to the main building I actually saw the Dr. Roach coming the other way and greeted him saying how impressed I was with his research. “If only those who dole out the research grants shared your view life would be so much easier.” I was surprised, I thought they would be queuing up to give him money. “If I could wave a magic wand what sort of grant would you like?” “A five year one so I could just get on with some research.” I looked at Phyllis imploringly, “You’d better send me a list of what you need, I take it you want funding for a couple of assistants and some additional equipment?” He looked taken back. “You’re joking?” “Phyllis never jokes about money. It’s OK the company has plenty.” “Any restrictions?” “I don’t think so, whatever interests you, we trust you.” Phyllis handed him her business card.

“Well apart from playing fairy godmother what brought you here today.” “Emily is thinking of going to University next year so I thought we’d look at yours and see if we can’t persuade her it’s a good idea.” “I’ll take you to see our admissions tutor I think he’d be the very person to see.”

“So what can I do for you?” he was short, overweight and jolly, kinda fun and I felt comfortable with him. “We were wondering about an undergraduate course starting next year for Emily, some sort of engineering degree. Looking through the prospectus on the way here I notice you don’t have a lot of female students in engineering this year and the staff to student ratio could be better.” The guy squirmed, and started to say something but Phyllis continued “However our foundation is prepared to fund an additional engineering researcher / lecturer for four years and we could probably run to a few bursary’s restricted to engineering at this college to encourage the female student numbers shall we say 40 are available for female students of $3,000 each for four years, and we shouldn’t forget the boys either, another 30 of $1,000 each for four years? If you could just arrange a copy of the application to be sent to those students you feel might be interested?” She handed him a form, and a USB stick. “There is an electronic version on the stick.”

I’ve seen guys rolled out by Phyllis before, she always seems to know just what is needed to get something done. “I hate to mention it but it would be normal to interview Emily and see her grades.” He looked almost apologetic as if he thought my grades wouldn’t be good enough. “I was going to show them to dad if he hadn’t got caught up in some sort of meeting but you can look at them certainly.” I pulled them out of my bag and handed them over. A look of relief came over his face as he saw my grades, “Yes well no problem there at all, I’ll just make a copy then I’ll show you round.”

Phyllis spotted a house for sale, well the guy was just putting a homemade sign up on the lawn as we took a taxi back to the landing field. Could we have a quick look round? We could, we did, I liked it and said so. It was practically walking distance to campus. Three bedrooms with a double garage on the side, Phyllis looked thoughtful and took the guy’s phone number down then we dashed off to meet dad for tea.

It was just over a year later we were in dad’s office “You can’t be serious, I’d always thought you would go and study flower arranging or some such at the local college, then Ken could drop you off in the limo in the morning and pick you up in the evening.” “But dad I want to study engineering.” “She’s growing up now, after all she’s the same age as the managing director’s mistress and at least she’s sensible.” “Is she really that old Phyllis? But it seems so far away, she’d be living away from home. It seems only yesterday I was dangling her on my knee.” Dad looked at me carefully, back to Phyllis then relented. “OK, I’d prefer a couple of bodyguards but they might draw to much unwanted attention to you. However you’re to take Phyllis with you for the first week so she can make sure you’ll be safe.” Inwardly I sighed, I hadn’t been certain he was going to let me go. I gave him a hug and a kiss, “Thanks dad.” then left him to chat with Phyllis.

“Is the managing director’s new mistress really my age?” “Six months younger but don’t get ideas. Now that you’re officially a student starting in ten days time it’s time we got you organised and out of here before your dad changes his mind, although I think his new planned takeover will keep him occupied for a while.” “Yes grandma.” I got such a look for that one.

Two days later I took my first train ride. Compared to a plane or even a limo there was like so much space. Our seats were facing two seats. Opposite was a girl about my own age buried in a book. Phyllis sat on the other side of the isle saying she’d some work to catch up on and I looked out of the window.

Just as the train pulled away a breathless student sat down beside me. Her name was Monica and her mom’s car wouldn’t start so it had been a bit rushed getting to the station. We sort of introduced ourselves and the girl opposite looked up. Erica it turned out was going to the same University to study engineering as well, weird I thought.

It was only at the next station when Alexis took the last seat of the four that it clicked and I suspected Phyllis’s deft hand had been at work. Erica wondered if we could share an apartment together so I looked across at Phyllis. “Is that your mom?” whispered Monica, Phyllis overheard, “Do I look that haggard? But yes I think getting something together might well be a sensible thing to do if you think you’ll all get on.” We talked about ourselves to see if we were compatible all the rest of the journey. Occasionally I’d look up to see Phyllis dozing away. How could she sleep when there was so much to see and discuss?

Eventually we arrived at our destination and lifted down our suitcases, pulled the handles out and rolled them onto the station concourse. Monica looked round “Funny my letter said I’d be met on the concourse.” Erica called out “Hi Katie” to yet another student who was sat waiting besides her luggage. “Is she studying engineering as well?” I asked, “No chemistry I think.” Well that was one theory shot down. I could feel in my bones that Phyllis was up to something.

“If everyone would like to wait by the kerb I’ll sort out the minivan rental, and yes Monica I’m Phyllis and I’m meeting you here.” Phyllis wondered off and the rest of them turned to me. Who was Phyllis and why was she meeting them? What was happening? I said I wasn’t sure what was happening but knowing Phyllis it would turn out OK cause she was OK.

We climbed in and Phyllis forestalled any questions by handing Katie a map with a red cross marked on it “Directions first please, explanations later.” I remembered the house we’d looked at before and guessed that was our destination. I remembered looking down from the plane and where the station was so I blurted out “You take this road coming up on the driver’s side then the second road on the other side.” I almost said left and right but sometimes I get them muddled up and dad isn’t very understanding. We turned off and Katie looked up from the map triumphantly said exactly right. The street had the right name at least.

We rolled up outside the same house except it looked different, it had two windows over the double garage which I didn’t remember from before. Phyllis opened the front door and we all wondered inside and looked round. It was empty, as in nothing there except for some sheers in the window.

“Take a seat everyone and I’ll explain everything.” We all sat cross legged on the floor. “Now you’ve all met Emily except Katie. My role is to make sure Emily has somewhere safe and secure to live, and that she’s happy whilst she is here, nothing else. Erica wondered if you could take an apartment together well that’s one option but another option is to live here with Emily. It would be rent free but you will need to pay the bills. I can arrange to have your tuition covered as well as a small monthly allowance which would mean you wouldn’t need a student loan.” “So we’d be Emily’s slaves?” “No Emily needs you as much as you need her, I’m trusted to ensure she’s safe so the other option for her is a secure apartment with two bodyguards which I’m quite certain she’d find irksome in the least. She gets the same monthly allowance by the way.”

“It’s my dad, he’s a bit overprotective sometimes.” “Anyway have a look round, we have a week to decorate and furnish the house so you get to choose your room, how it’s decorated and furnished. When you’ve looked and discussed come back and we’ll talk a little more. If you all decide that you can stand each other then we’ll start by shopping for carpets this afternoon but I don’t think we can get any beds delivered until tomorrow so its sleeping bags on the carpet tonight.” “Cool like a sleep over.” “Emily is the only one who doesn’t get a choice by the way, she’ll be in the room at the back with the ensuite.” I put my tongue out at her.

The house was much the same except that three more largish bedrooms and an extra bathroom had been added over the garage, the smallest of the old bedrooms was really tiny, more of a closet than anything else, the second bedroom wasn’t much bigger. My room was the old master bedroom I thought it might work, especially if I lined the wall next to the second bedroom with bookcases to keep it quiet. I like quiet places.

We returned to the family room, Phyllis had produced mugs of coffee for everyone. “Well have you decided?” “Are you nuts? We get to decorate and furnish our own rooms as we like them, and we end up with no student loan. We aren’t so we’re in. After chatting to Emily on the train for four hours we think she’s OK as well.” I saw Phyllis let her breath out. “Anyway you’ve been planning this a long time haven’t you. Katie and I had really strange summer jobs with different companies, we thought we’d just been sent off on a training course to keep us out of the office because they didn’t know what to do with us. But four months of boot camp learning to be a VIP body guard over the summer wasn’t just coincidence was it?” “Well if you will put martial arts on your CV what do you expect?” “I even called mom about what to do since I thought it must be a mistake and she reminded me how much they were paying me per hour and thought I ought to stick it out.”

“Is that why I ended up on an advanced commercial cookery course? I thought they just wanted me out of the office.” “But you did do so very well on it.” Murmured Phyllis. We all turned our heads towards Monica. “I got a letter saying my application for summer employment was successful even though I didn’t recall applying. Mine was a middle management course and covered things like teamwork, planning, negotiating agreements and such. I was the only type B person on the course and the other course members hated the way that the instructors liked my solutions.” She looked round at us, “I’ve only just realised we’re all type B people, it can’t be coincidence can it?” “Well no, if you recall each of you had a visit from Amanda, something about she’d forgotten some information on the application for a bursary form?” The girls looked at each other. “You mean she went round all of us?” “Well yes, and all the other applicants, I just hand-picked the ones whom I thought Emily would get on best with. I don’t think any of you are party animals for example.”

I’d seen Phyllis at work before and knew she could pay a lot of attention to the details but even I was surprised by the amount of effort she’d put in.

“Having heard all the gory details do you still want to live with me?” I mean I had to ask. They all nodded in turn. I let my breath out, I hadn’t even realised I’d been holding it.

I guess I really ought to describe Monica, she was a tall girl with long legs and she knew how to display them to the best effect. Before we went shopping she changed into what she called her negotiating dress. A short skirt as the saying goes looks good on a short girl, it emphasises her legs and makes her look taller. On Monica it was spectacular. Finished off with white ankle socks, for as she said the mixture keeps them off balance. She told me later that she got ignored for the first two weeks of the management course before she talked to one of the support staff. After that she wore her negotiating dress whenever she needed to distract them. She said the older they were the easier it was.

We hit the carpet warehouse first, armed with the measurements Phyllis chose the quality and pile first then we were permitted to choose the colours out of the ones they had in stock. Phyllis wanted good quality carpet that would absorb the sound and stand up to five active teenagers even if the care instructions about vacuuming it once a day were ignored. The salesman was pleased with the order and asked which day next week we’d like the delivery and fitting. That went down like a lead balloon.

Monica stepped forward and mentioned we were thinking we’d like it done by midnight. “Not possible, I’m afraid.” “Even if we pay with real plastic?” “Even for credit cards.” “No plastic, I’d better show you.” She motioned Erica to step forward and kneeling before her, undid her belt, her fly zipper on her jeans and wiggled the tight jeans off her hips. She slipped her hand down the front of Erica’s sheer knickers and pulled out a handful of polymer banknotes. “We were going to use a money belt but it spoiled the line of her jeans.” Erica wiggled her jeans back up and did her zip up. Monica counted out the notes and held them out. “They’re a bit warm so slippy to count. You’re not allergic to perfume are you, they have a bit of Erica’s lingering on them. Have a smell.”

I mean I’ve seen the phrase “dropped jaw” in books before but I’d never really noticed a live one before. The salesman was stunned. “I’ll go and speak to the lads.” Monica slipped over to me “Quick take your slip off.” Mystified I slid my waist slip off and bundled it into my bag. Monica rolled my waistband over twice and pulled my blouse out to cover the bulge. My skirt was now showing five inches of thigh above my knee, far more than even my shortest skirts normally did. Then she undid the pin that held the wrap over together. I hoped it wasn’t too breezy outside.

The voice came drifting through from the back. “They want a whole house installed this evening? They’re mad. I’ll go and tell them if you aren’t man enough.” Monica was bending over to inspect a sample carpet more closely with her back to the office. I saw what looked like a carpet fitter storm out of the office pause to admire her butt and tiny white sheer knickers. Monica whirled round and brushed her dress down at the back, which had the effect of stretching the material at the front and emphasizing her nipples poking through the thin material. “I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to turn my back on you.” She motioned to me to join her so I strode across the showroom fairly quickly. The two guys who had come out of the office door had sort of come to a half stunned halt when Monica had been bending over. They went completely still, focusing on my legs as I walked across the showroom. I couldn’t understand it at all, I mean Monica was showing almost twice as much thigh as I and I wasn’t used to this stunned reaction. I thought I might like to get used to it though, it gave one a sense of power, a sort of inner glow, a feeling of confidence.

“I do hope we can bribe you. The house is completely empty at the moment and we need to buy some furniture so we’d really like to get the carpets done whilst the house is empty.” Monica motioned Katie over and kneeling before her undid her tight jeans just as she’d done with Erica. I remember thinking they were wearing matching knickers as I watched Monica’s fingers through the thin gauzy material as she scooped out two bills and handed them one each to the two fitters. “I hope you aren’t sensitive to Katie’s perfume. Is that a big enough bribe or should we try the store down the road?” She asked innocently as she turned, and kneeling before Katie, tugged Katie’s zipper up.

“Emily and I are quite willing to stand over you and help by holding things for you, like tools and such or help unroll the carpets, and we could probably find you something to nibble on if not some proper food.” You could read their minds when she said nibble, their eyes were glued to her chest. I didn’t dare think about what sort of things we would be holding in their imagination.

“Yes well my colleague was a little hasty in saying we couldn’t manage anything until next week.” “Could you work this evening then they could let you take Friday off instead, isn’t there a big game on then?” I thought Monica must have something irritating her in her eye that caused her eyelids to flutter like that. I bent forward and was scrambling in my purse to find a suitable clean handkerchief when the penny dropped. I mean it was so corny it couldn’t possibly work could it?

“It will take us a while to tidy and load the van up. We’ll be there in say an hour and a half?” Monica beamed and gave them a peck on the cheek. The girls left but I stayed in the doorway not wanting to chance the breeze with my skirt. Behind me I heard “So just what happened guys? Did you tell them no way or what?” I glanced back to see two notes being sniffed, “Well sometimes you just have to go with what the customer wants.” “They sure are one class act, did you notice the glimpses of stocking top and bare thigh above on the Blonde when she walked across the room and when she scrabbled in her purse? I mean she acted so innocently as like she really didn’t know what she was doing.” Blonde, that had to be me, Oh God had my wrap over skirt really shown that much. I grasped my skirt on either side to stop it blowing in the breeze and fled blushing to the van.

“You were really great back there” Monica enthused, “I thought you were wearing stockings and that’s what turned it I think.” I sat quietly in the van feeling very overheated. “I think we’ve just got time for beds next, Monica can you handle the haggling for five Queen sized beds?” “Queen why Queen my old one was a single.” I heard myself say. “Well trust me on this but a Queen is much more comfortable if you ever find a boyfriend. Thinking of which remind me to show you one or two possibles when we get back. They’re so useful for putting up shelves, warming toes and putting the garbage out.” “Katie and I would be quite happy to share a room.” “A pair of twins then?” “Well we sort of thought it might be nice to have the same sort of bed as everyone else.” I was shocked, I tried not to show it. “But shouldn’t you get to know someone a bit first?” I heard myself say. “We got to know each other very well on our summer course.” replied Erica. “Oh congratulations.” “Great, girl power to the max.” “We should have some sort of celebration.”

Phyllis pulled into the parking lot outside the “Sleep Store” and we piled in. Phyllis had given Monica an idea of the budget and having one less bed to buy helped. The sales guy seemed tied up with an expensively dressed older woman who seemed to be lamenting the fact that her daughter’s sheets didn’t pull down over the mattress very well. We wondered round looking at the colours of the mattresses until Monica decided we didn’t have time to wait around and led us towards the door. “If you’ll just wait a moment I’ll get dad to come and look after you. I’m afraid he’s a bit slow at the moment ever since mother died six months ago.” He turned to the back of the store, “Dad can you sort out some students?” then turned back to murmur more words of sympathy to the woman.

Dad shuffled out, he had a sad look about him. He glanced at us and summed us up. “Five single beds, the cheapest we’ve got and do we do a student discount?” Monica and I approached him by the office. “Sorry we can only afford four beds but we’d like good quality queen size ones please.” I think we surprised him. “Well do you know what you’re buying or would you like some guidance?” “Guidance please.” He put his hand out to shake ours, it felt so cold. “Do you have trouble with arthritis in your hands?” I found myself asking. He nodded, “You should keep your hands warm.” I admonished him. I sat on the edge of the bed and Monica placed his right hand between my over warm thighs, I looked at her in astonishment. “Well you look a bit warm after the carpet store and it will help cool you down.” Well I couldn’t disagree could I without making a scene especially as I was the one who had mentioned he should keep his hands warm so I nodded.

Dad started his patter, he spoke of wire thickness, coils, pocket coils, pads, pillow tops, covering materials and all sorts of things. Not thinking I wiggled a bit so his hand was a little higher on my thigh above my stocking tops, well I was hot there and his hand was cool. I noticed as he spoke we were a bit private from the rest of the store and that Monica was holding his left hand between her thighs and lightly brushing the front of his slacks as if to remove a bit of fluff. It seemed to me that she was practically giving him a hand job through his slacks. He didn’t seem to notice though just carried on with his sales pitch on how yet another manufacturer’s products were slightly different to the last ones. His thumb was brushing back and forth over my mound. I didn’t want to draw attention to myself so said nothing. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I hadn’t worn my cream silk knickers with the seam down the front, his thumb seemed to flick from one side of the seam and back again flicking my engorged hood at the same time. Monica by now had unzipped him and was moving her thumb back and forth over his exposed glistening head. I was fascinated, with my rather sheltered upbringing it was the first one I'd seen.

Monica read my facial expression at a glance before taking my hand and wrapping it round his secret weapon. “Just move your thumb round in gentle circles over the top.” Dad continued onto the importance of selecting the correct pillow and how different people had different needs. Then he just dried up, and stopped talking. I felt him twitch beneath my fingers and some sticky white stuff sort oozed out under my thumb. Monica took charge and wiped him off with a tissue from her bag. “I'm sorry, I didn't hurt you or anything did I?” I heard myself say. “It's just I've never seen or touched one before.” Oh God I wanted the ground to just swallow me up. “No I'm fine, but it's the first time in forty years that I've forgotten what I was saying. There's a washroom in the corner if you want to wash your hands.” Dad tugged up his zipper. “Now then what's your exact budget and we'll see what we can do.” Monica told him our budget but mentioned we'd really like to keep it below that figure to avoid things like student loans. “Credit card?” “No cash as in dollar bills.” “Let me go and sort out the lady in the front then we'll talk.”

Monica and I quickly rinsed our hands and came back to overhear the conversation at the far end of the store, I sort of made my mind up that I wanted to experiment more so that sort of meant a boy friend. I wondered where you got them from. The elegantly dressed lady was trying to return some wedding presents. She had two dozen Queen sized sheets that didn’t fit her daughter’s Queen sized bed. Dad explained that Queen sized beds these days had deeper mattresses so needed bigger sheets. “But none of them fitted, not a single one and sorry but I don’t have the receipts.” Dad asked to see them and when he saw that all the packets had been opened and the sheets tried on the bed plus she had no receipts he explained that he didn’t think he could do a refund. “Do you know the exact model of the bed she brought?” “Not exactly, it was a creamy coloured mattress though if that helps, could you just send them back to the manufacturer and get a refund?” “Not unless there is a fault or they are still unopened.”

“The best I can do is an exchange based on the sale price we had for them in January. Unfortunately we got a deal from the manufacturer on a cancelled order so had them on sale at 50% off. I’ve got ten King sized sheets in the back that might be a little big but at least they’d fit. Do you want to exchange the pillow cases as well so they match?” The lady shrugged and accepted the deal. Dad’s son sorted out the details whilst dad returned to us.

To cut a long story short we ended up with four double beds, two last year’s cover, and two were floor models, four separate pillow tops, all the bed linen that had been given as wedding presents that didn’t fit, all top quality stuff we were assured unlike the king sized she’d been fobbed off with. Dad confided that the very high quality sheets she’d brought in never went on sale but felt she ought to pay some sort of penalty. Five duvets with covers but we had to go back and collect them the next day and bring them home on top of the van, oh and a sofa bed for as Dad said with five students in the house there were bound to be visitors from time to time and Monica did it all for just over half our budget.

We all disappeared into the kitchen when we got back and Alexis supervised us whilst we made what she called workman food, burgers, fries and mushy peas but with top quality ingredients and mayonnaise with the fries and plenty of them. Monica had us all change into summer dresses to show a bit of leg as she put it. She had to lend me one as none of mine were deemed suitable.

Can you imagine four guys arrived, to get the job done quicker or so they said. Erica and I dragged old carpet downstairs and dumped it in the garage. Monica floated round everywhere bending over to pick things up when requested and generally flaunting her Swiss lace knickers, I tried not to show quite so much of my French lace.

We fed all four, fortunately Alexis knew how much to cook then had doubled the quantities just in case. It was great I’d never tried mushy peas before. Apparently they’re some sort of regional delicacy from Europe.

As I passed an open bedroom door I overheard one of the younger workmen say to the older one. “What’s to stop me just having them? I mean the way they’re flaunting their bodies.” “These are a class act so don’t even think about it. Take the tall dark one think they called her Katie, for example I’ve seen people move like that before. From the clothes in her room I suspect she knows the Jewish form of martial arts, and let me tell you your two weeks of night school Judo would count for nothing.”

“Is there a Jewish form of Martial arts?” I heard him ask Katie later on. “Krav Maga, why wanna practise?” “No no, just curious, we need to press on if we are to finish tonight.”

They were great, they actually managed the entire house by midnight. Well they had Monica and myself helping on our hands and knees banging nails in with our pert bottoms in the air and I now know how to lay fitted carpet. In fact they offered me a weekend job if I wanted one but I declined.

I hadn’t realised how fit and strong Katie and Erica were until it came to moving the beds upstairs. They just sailed up, I got the one with the extra pillow top and we put the sofa bed in the spare room for Phyllis.

The following week was an orgy of furniture shopping discussing what would work and why was more than half the fun. Phyllis talked us into solid furniture rather than the more flimsy flat pack stuff. Except for the book cases we needed so many that we thought we’d buy the same flat pack style throughout so we could rearrange them from time to time. Katie and Erica wanted to spend the money from their second bedroom on what they called implements of torture for the basement. They had a catalogue of keep fit exercise equipment but Phyllis said just to tell her what they wanted and she’d put it through separately as she hadn’t thought about it or budgeted it originally. Oh and we met Victoria.

Well we were sort of passing the university and thought we’d go and see our personal tutor, Phyllis had somehow arranged that Dr. Roach would be the personal tutor for the whole gang, even Katie who was doing Chemistry so officially was in another department. We knocked on his office door and trooped in. Alexis seemed to be the spokesperson “Hi personal tutor.” He looked up “Has term started already or are you a bit early?” Alexis mentioned we were a bit early but thought we’d pop in to say hello. He looked round and I saw he recognised me. “It’s the first time I’ve actually been a personal tutor, I normally do more on the research side so we’ll have to learn as we go. Now have you all found somewhere to live?” “We all live together.” “All of you including Emily?” “Well in would be more accurate to say we live with Emily.” He paused then very deliberately asked “Have you met Phyllis?” We all nodded. “Hang on a mo I’ll get my research assistants.” He returned with Victoria and Paul and introduced them before asking us to introduce ourselves. Victoria looked as if she didn’t relish any extra babysitting work until she heard the words “and finally this is Emily of Emily and the magic wand.” when her face lit up and she smiled warmly at me. “If there’s anything Paul or I can do just let me know.” “I think we can take a team approach to your personal tutoring needs. Is there anything we can do at the moment?” “Could you manage to come to lunch on Sunday, I’ve always wanted to cook a proper Sunday lunch with apple pie.” I crossed my fingers and hoped Alexis wouldn’t mind supervising me. Paul who had been a bit distracted until then quickly accepted on behalf of all.

“Phyllis, you mentioned boyfriends a couple of times like for putting the garbage out and keeping your toes warm at night, how do you get one?” We were sprawled round the family room sort of hanging out. “Well what would be important?” “Well endowed?” Contributed Alexis, Phyllis pulled out a file and said “Now this is strictly confidential but I have here a few notes on some possibles who applied for bursaries. I’ve one or two candidates here, Lionel for example I happen to know is very well endowed, eight inches and the width to go with it.” I was blushing but I also know Phyllis, she’d never offer up her preferred solution so easily. “OK if that’s what Alexis would like she can have him since there must be some sort of drawback to him. I think I’d rather have someone a bit old fashioned who likes books please.” “Miss hard to please today aren’t you? But you’re right of course Lionel actually is very pleasant and trustworthy and his boyfriend thinks the world of him.” It was Alexis turn to blush as we teased her about what was important. “I think of the ones I’ve looked at Joshua looks the best fit but there are limits to what I do and one of them is procuring boyfriends so you’ll have to attach him yourself.” “Is he gay?” “No but he’s a little old fashioned in that he wears a shirt and tie normally.” “I’ve never picked up a guy before.” “No problem we can work on it together. Pass his file.” “I’ve picked out a couple more that you might like to have a read of.” I read them but they didn’t seem to give me the same itch as my Joshua.

The next day as we trooped in to the student lounge Monica spotted Lionel sitting by himself. It was too good to resist. Erica and Katie slipped in on one side, Alexis and Monica on the other. I took his lap and wrapping both arms round his neck kissed him on the cheek. The girls were running their hands over any part they could reach. “Hi Lionel, I’m Emily, and the others are Alexis, Katie, Monica, and Erica. We’re going to be the very best of friends.” and went to give him another sloppy kiss which he evaded so it landed on his cheek again. “I’m not interested.” “Of course you are or we’ll put your name down on the best endowed guy list in the ladies washroom. You’ll be the top of the list.” A look of panic came over his face, “Don’t joke like that. Alright what do you want?” “It’s alright we’re only teasing you, want another coffee?” and so started our very odd relationship with Lionel. I mean who else but five girls and Lionel would even think about rating guys butts when they walked by? We liked him he was safe.

Joshua, well I’d been in a crowded elevator with him and decided I liked his smell if you know what I mean but getting closer was proving to be a problem. I could sense he was interested but even when Erica suggested “Why not just ask him out on a date?” I couldn’t do it, I wasn’t comfortable about doing it and where would we go? Besides he might say no. Katie tried approaching him wearing a very short skirt but if anything it seemed to make him nervous.

We were sat round glumly trying to figure out what to do about Joshua. At the moment he seemed as unobtainable as Lionel so did I write him off? I still liked his smell, and one thing about Phyllis’s suggestions was they generally worked out. “Couldn’t we just buy him.” “Modern day slave market you mean?” “Well something like that, I mean there’s a girl auction coming up couldn’t we just buy him then.” “He’d never enter.” “If I can get him up on the stage can you outbid the rest?” “Money’s no problem.” “I thought you had the same allowance as the rest of us.” “Yes but I’ve saved my allowance for the last few years, you never know when it might be useful.” “If you bid a larger sum he might feel more obligated and it is for charity.” I mulled, “OK we’ll do it but he deserves to suffer a little, I’ll have a chat with Lionel.”

“Well now we’ve figured out how to get him how about sprucing your night time wardrobe up so you keep him? I mean cotton pyjamas might be practical but you never find them in the bridal section.” We went shopping the bridal sections for new more appropriate nightwear, I mean if you’re feeling glum it’s always uplifting to find the perfect whatever, besides Joshua was a good excuse to spend some of my hard saved allowance. I can’t begin to describe how five girls all crammed themselves into one changing room to express an opinion on how my body looked in one sheer nightgown or other.

We sat watching the girl auction, I’d borrowed one of Katie’s summer short dresses and was feeling rather self conscious about how much leg I was exposing. How anyone could stand up there and action themselves off I’ll never know. The first few girls went for around $15-20. One came out in heavy makeup and an ultra short skirt. Katie nudged me and said “watch them go for peanuts” I looked at her, “That’s what the guys call her as in peanut butter, easy to spread.” She made $95. Erica couldn’t see why, she’d already got the reputation of being anyone’s just for the asking. There were a few more $30 girls, then one blonde with dark roots came out and grabbed the microphone from the auctioneer. She knew how to work the crowd and said she was determined to get the highest price and she was willing to do anything and she meant absolutely anything to get it. I was ashamed to be female. She worked them slowly up to $170, at one point she even stripped off her blouse and pooled her skirt and with her shelf bra there was no mistaking what was on offer. It seemed she was going down for $170 when “Common guys I’m worth twice any of the others, two of you club together and for two hundred you’ll be two very lucky guys for two nights starting tonight, just the three of us together.” She got her $200 bid. I still hadn’t seen any sign of any guy on the stage offering himself up for auction never mind Joshua.

“Well thank you for your generous bids but since we’re all out of girls I guess it’s time to say goodbye.” An innocent looking Monica dressed in a full skirt with a white petticoat peeping out underneath stood up and waving a $5 note in the air announced “But I’ve still got my $5, I want to bid on the guy with the tie at the back.” Heads swivelled to see Joshua wearing the only tie in the place. “But it’s a girl auction.” “So I’m a girl and I want to bid.” Monica did a little curtsey. “Sexist.” The cry was taken up around the room. The auctioneer looked apologetic “If you’d like to just step this way sir, you wouldn’t want to disappoint the little lady now would you.” Somehow a group of females had surround Joshua and he was put on the spot. He reluctantly walked up to the stage. “I’m bid $5, going, going..” the auctioneer was obviously going to get this over with when a loud cry of $6 was heard. The bids came from all the corners of the room it’s amazing what you can organise with a few text messages.

Joshua just look bemused as the bids rolled in, that is until an obviously homosexual male bid $20. His expression was one of shock, followed by relief as a girl in front of me who wasn’t part of the plan bid $21 turning to her neighbour afterwards saying “There’s too few available males round here as it is so I had to try to save him.” The bids moved on then another male upped the bids to $85. I let him sweat for a while, the auctioneer looked desperately round for another bid then he said the words very slowly “Going, going.” I sent the text and the bids rolled once more.

I didn’t know there were so many gays around, I do know that Lionel had been working hard. Even I wasn’t expecting the placards with “Gay Power” to spring up at the back, nor the others with “Girl Power” on them either. Someone was making a political statement.

The crowd took it in good fun and was hugely entertained. From the expressions passing over Joshua’s face he didn’t find it quite so entertaining.

Lionel’s friends were brilliant at adlibbing. Two stood up and pointing to themselves “One, two Joint bid Two hundred dollars. It’ll be two very lucky guys starting tonight, just the three of us together.” Joshua looked scared. The auctioneer tried to refuse the bid, it was nearly bedlam when Erica stood up in a line with three other girls and pointing to themselves counted out “One, two, three, four, Joint bid four hundred dollars for four very lucky girls tonight. Do we get our money back if he doesn’t last?” The crowd erupted in laughter and the dark rooted blond glowered at the side of the stage. Joshua was looking even more worried, time to bring it to a close before the poor guy got too stressed and walked off. Lionel stood up and waving a wad of $100 bills bid one thousand dollars. The room just went silent. There was a delay before the auctioneer finally announced “Going, going, gone.” and banged his gravel. “If you the successful bidders would just like to come forward and claim their” he hesitated looking for a politically correct word “lots. I’ll wish you a good afternoon and thank you for the most financially successful auction.” Monica dashed forward and grabbed a microphone, “Just one moment ladies and gentlemen we still have one person left. He’s a bit hoarse after running the auction this afternoon but what am I bid for the auctioneer?” She knocked him down for $15 which everyone thought was very reasonable.

Joshua’s face was priceless as Lionel walked up and paid my thousand dollars. “Shall we go?” Lionel offered to Joshua. Together they walked over towards me. “One unbirthday present delivered. Should I arrange for him to be bound first then delivered?” Lionel enquired, I kissed Joshua on the lips, he tasted nice. “You must be Alice.” Well at least he’d heard of the Mad Hatter’s tea party, “Emily Alice, I’m usually called Emily, and now its tea party time so back to our place.” I led him away and the rest of the gang followed and as he glimpsed Monica as part of the entourage he murmured to me “I was set up wasn’t I?” “Whatever made you think a thing like that?” I murmured back.

We fed him, Alexis had been keeping an eye on what he chose in the food court so had a good idea what he might enjoy. He started to relax over his food especially as we didn’t make him the centre of attention but chatted generally about this and that. At the end of the meal after coffee I turned to him “Would you like to look over our house?” he acquiesced so I led the way in Katie’s short summer dress flashing French lace at him with every step up the stairs.

We looked through the other bedrooms first and when we arrived at mine I announced “and this is our room.” There was a definite pause in the conversation “I think we should move on and show him the rest of the house.” Erica led the way down to the basement. I hadn’t been down there since she and Katie had been decorating and I was keen to see what they’d done. I looked around, their infamous Sybian was in evidence against the wall I hoped that Joshua didn’t recognise it for what it was. There was some sort of complicated frame that looked like it was for exercising full of wires and so forth besides the weight bench and treadmill.

“I think we should show him the frame and how it works.” “An excellent idea.” We surrounded him and had his shirt off before he realised what was happening. Erica and Katie clipped his wrists to the frame whilst Alexis undid his trousers and attached his ankles. Monica held up a book with the title “Enhanced Interrogation Techniques” in large letters on the front. “What are we doing?” I asked hesitantly. “Joshua is introverted and it says in my book the way they make decisions is minimum negative.” “So?” “We just have to find something he considers worse than admitting he likes you.” “Oh.” “Want to talk?” Joshua replied “Do your worst.” Well that was a silly thing to say to Katie and Erica wasn’t it. “OK guy.” Katie picked up a large syringe. “Now in here we have the predecessor to Viagra. You just inject it directly into the penis and it stays hard for hours.” I don’t think Joshua liked the idea of an injection, especially in his tender parts. “Followed by a phone call to those two young men who seemed so interested earlier mentioning you weren’t interested in girls at all and more into BDSM or should it be phone call first so your erection lasts longer? A few souvenir snaps showing just your face and erection, amazing how they can escape onto the Internet. I’d say combined with all those male bids at the auction your reputation would be well established.” There was a whirl as the contraption scooped up Joshua and held him with his butt touching the lubricated probe from the Sybian which Alexis had thoughtfully moved beneath him. “and if we left you gagged with this ball gag what do you think they would think if they lifted up a modesty towel and found a rock hard prick beneath it whilst the Sybian was vibrating up your bum?”

“Shall we try once more?” Erica picked up the large syringe and held it close to Joshua’s face. “Do you like Emily?” “Don’t you think he’d say anything under duress?” I ventured, “Well yes but in this case Alexis already has overheard him admit to fancying you so it all about getting him to express his feelings and to that you really do need this handy book of “Enhanced Interrogation Techniques”. Have you ever known any male express their feelings?” I thought about it, even dad had difficulty sometimes. I nodded, “We’d better make the phone call then.”

“Alright I admit it I like Emily and I fancy her.” “Do you think we ought to get him to repeat it louder and tape record it for prosperity?” “No let him down, that’s good enough.”

He had a bewildered and lost look about him. “Why did you go to such lengths?” “It was hard to approach you, even Alexis who normally finds it easy to get into conversations with people remarked it was difficult. “The student food court.” Alexis smiled. “Phyllis had already identified you as being special and we had to move fast.” “Why?” “For a start we have boxes of flat pack bookcases to go together and after the first one we were getting desperate.” Grinned Katie. “Emily has money and when it leaks out then that might attract the wrong sort of attention.” “And not only that but once they know you can’t always be certain about what someone says, so having to put you on the rack first and you only admitting it reluctantly means it’s probably the truth. Now it’s time to return to our room since I assume you’re moving in. House rules are you get tuition, rent and book list paid, but we split bills and you get to put the garbage out.” “The garbage?” “Well you could hardly expect any of us to do it could you.” Chimed in Erica, “After all there are limits to what us girls do.”