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 Chapter Four

   Becky called to see if she could come over.  A little while later I
heard the knock on my door.

   Sitting on the sofa, she asked Haley to let us talk alone.  After Haley
left, she said, "Insurance paid off the house and Haley's the only heir. 
She's gonna get a chunk of insurance money.  But there's something strange
I need to talk to you about."

   What's that?" I asked.

   "Marie and Steve left a kind of a will.  Lawyer says it's mostly legal."

   Yeah?"

   "Well, this part ain't like binding, or anything, but they said in their
will that they wanted YOU to raise Haley.  Wanted us to ask you."

   If I had't been sitting, I would have hit the floor.  As it was, I fell
back against the back of the sofa.  "What?!?!?"

   "Here's a copy.  Says right here, if you're willing, Haley should stay
with you."

   I read it.

   "Me an' my husband are next of kin, so if you don't do it, she comes to
us, an' we're not in the best of shape.  Haley might have told you.  Her
money'd help, but it's in a trust or something and you're named conservator
whether she stays with you or not.  The lawyer says you control where the
money goes."

   "Yeah, that's the way that works.  Becky, Haley's like my own.  She can
stay here if she wants."

   Becky sighed.  "She wants.  I've talked to her.  You need to go see this
lawyer and sign some papers and stuff."

   "Okay."

   "Haley," she called, "Come in here."

   Haley dutifully appeared.  "Yes, ma'am?"

   Haley," Becky said, "Your mom and Steve wanted you to stay with Mr. 
Bill if you want and if he wants to keep you.  He said it's okay with him.'

   Haley looked at me, a smile beginning to bend the corners of her mouth.
"Thank you, Mr.  Bill," she said, demurely.

   Becky continued, "Now Mr.  Bill is going to be your guardian and he has
control of the insurance money from your Mom and Steve.  The house is
yours, too.  But you're still my niece, and we want to see you, okay?"

   "Yes, ma'am," said Haley.  She hugged her aunt and once more the
enormity of the loss of her family wracked her body in sobs.

   Aunt Becky patted her.  "It'll be all right, hon.  Mr.  Bill is a nice
man.  He'll take good care of you."

   Becky left me a business card for a lawyer.  The next day I took off
work to go see him, signing a pile of papers, and found myself a legal
guardian.  Driving home I contemplated if my crime had gone from pedophilia
to incest.

   I was sitting at home when Haley got off the bus and walked in.  "Hi,
sweetie," I said.  "How was school?"

   "Same stuff.  I couldn't wait to get home, though."

   "Are you okay?"

   "Sure, Bill.  We need to talk, though."

   I wasn't sure where this was leading.  "What do you want to talk about?"

   "Us." She shook her bangs out of her eyes.  I remembered that now I had
to take her to get a haircut or whatever it was that young girls got.  I
was sure my barber wasn't going to be sufficient for that task.

   She continued, "Remember when I said I loved you and you said you loved
me?  An' I said `forever'?"

   "Of course I remember."

   "Still mean it?"

   "Do you?"

   She looked at me, eyes trusting and innocent.  "Yes." Pause "I do."

   "Are you sure, Haley?  I mean, things just changed.

   Before, you and I were going to be doing the odd ofaternoon, and the
iffy weekend and maybe a week here and there.  That's all changed.  If I
need to be a dad here, then I need to know that.  If I still get to be
Haley's love, like I was, I need to know that, too."

   She went to her knees on the sofa beside me and her arms went around my
neck.  "I don't want anything to change, except to get better.  I love you
the way I always loved you." She kissed me.  Then started on my neck. 
Leaving a hickey.

   "Haley!"

   "Yes, Bill?"

   "We need to have a serious talk here."

   "Ooooo, okay!  Then we can fuck?"

   "Stop using that word.  It's not nice for little girls."

   "Okay.  But I want to, you know."

   "Okay.  But let's talk.  You're living here full time now.  It's kind of
strange, but it's got to look as normal as we can make it.  You have to
keep your own bedroom and use it for stuff, so if somebody comes over,
it'll look like Haley's bedroom."

   "But we can still sleep together, right?"

   "Of course, little love.  Except when Deena is here.  Then you're my
adopted daughter, or whatever.  And at school.  And in public any time.

   "Hee-hee... Okay!  I can do all that."

   I'm gonna go down there to school tomorrow and show them the papers and
get MY name put on all your stuff."

   "And listen, precious angel, here's something else.  We're full time
now, almost like married people."

   "Ooooo, I know," she sparkled.

   "Yeah, you know, but I've BEEN married, and even if you think somebody
loves you today, tomorrow they may not.  But we're NOT married, I'm your
guardian.  And that's kind of strange."

   "Oh, Bill, I'll never stop loving you."

   "I believe you, baby, but even if we love each other, we may get mad at
each other.  And you can't run home.  This IS home."

   "Uh-huh."

   "So we need to cherish each other and sometimes recognize that the other
might not be having an easy day or week and may need some understanding,
and that we love each other underneath words, okay?  Even though harsh
words may come, we still love each other, okay?"

   "Bill, you've never said a harsh word around me."

   "You've never lived with me full time, baby."

   "Okay, dear Bill." She said.  "Now, your Haley needs holding."

   "And no more hickeys."

   Giggle.  "I had to give you one.  You never gave me one."

   I scooped her up, carried her into the bedroom and gave her a hickey
right above her right nipple.  And we made love.  Gently.  Then hard.  Then
in the afterglow, we fit together, kissing and hugging.

   "I love you, Bill."

   "I love you, Haley."

   "Forever?"

   "Forever."

   The next afternoon I went to Haley's school.  I presented the court
papers to the staff and explained things as we changed notification numbers
and everything like that.  I had already filed copies of the papers with my
employer that morning so she was on my insurance.  I did all the things to
make Haley mine.  Except she was thirteen (now) and I was thirty years
older.  It was near the end of the school day so I had them call Haley out
of her last class to go home with me.

   I watched as she walked up the hall to the office.  When she saw me, her
step took an extra spring and she smiled.  We walked to my van.  Her books
went in the back seat.

   "Take the long way home," she said.

   "Why?"

   "Just go down some back roads, okay?" There was mischief in her eyes.

   I knew a looping country road.  I took it.  I looked.  She was slipping
out of her seat belt.  "Put your seat belt back on!"

   "Nuh-uh," she said.  She laid across the seat and her hands went to my
fly.  "Hmmm.  A puzzle.  I love puzzles." Zip.  "Oh, I solved it.  I can
get the prize now!" She retrieved my dick with her fingertips.  It hardened
as she got it out.  "What have we here?  Oh!  A mushroom!  I just LOVE
mushrooms!" And her head bobbed downward.

   "Haley!  You're gonna make me wreck!"

   "Then stop for a couple of minutes.  I can make this happen!" She looked
at me and grinned lustily.

   I pulled off on the shoulder and she went to work on me.  My little
Haley may never be the world's greatest blow-job artist, but I do know that
she has complete mastery of how one dick works: mine.  In my lap a symphony
of lips and teeth and tongue and hands was going one and it wasn't long
before her efforts brought me to climax.  She sucked me dry.  Every spurt
she got, and then she sucked me gently until I was soft, then smiling
innocently, she tucked my dick back in my pants and zipped me up.

   "There," she said, patting my fly.  "That was good!"

   I sighed, "Yes, darlin', it was.  I owe you one."

   "Two," she giggled.  I got an `A" on a math test.  I want TWO!" And we
drove home so I could work off my debt.

   Supper was delivery pizza.  I didn't feel bad about this.  Apparently my
little darling would eat it seven days a week.  We cleared off the table
and tidied up the kitchen, then showered together, a feat that left me with
the cleanest dick and balls on the planet.  Outside the shower, we toweled
off at opposite ends of the bathroom and then she sat while I brushed and
dried her hair.

   "We need to get you a haircut, dearie," I said.  "I don't even know who
to call, much less what to ask for."

   "I know the lady who's been doing it.  We can call her.  And get her to
do the same thing.  Is that okay?"

   "Works for me.  I just thought girls like to change things up
sometimes."

   "Maybe.  But not now.  I'm kind of used to this one.  No, maybe I could
get it dyed blue.  How would you like to look in your lap and see a blue
head sucking on you?"

   "You're terrible."

   I know.  Just for you.  nah, leave it like this.  I like it."

   "Me too." I finished brushing.  She tossed her head, her hair fresh and
shiny and sassy.  She stood and I wrapped her in my arms from behind,
pulling her back into me.  She wiggled and giggled and my dick responded
quickly.

   "There you go again," she said.  "Let's get in bed."

   Like I was going argue with that suggestion.  She rolled backward into
the bed and held her arms out for me.  I crawled in between her thighs and
planted a kiss on her pubic mound, her `muffin', we called it.  She cooed,
"Ooooo, come kiss me, baby!" I moved up to kiss her, resting my weight on
my knees and arms.  Her arms pulled on me to lay on her.  "Sometimes I just
want you to press on me," she said.  I felt her lithe body wiggle
underneath me as she slid down, then lips and teeth fastened onto my
nipple. She giggled.  "Found something."

   I held her in my arms and rolled onto my back, carrying my lover with
me. She took advantage of her position to spread her legs and straddle me.
Her wet pussy trapped my dick in between her and my belly and she started
riding it back and forth.  My hands wandered up and down her body, savoring
her with my touch as she worked her little clit on the underside of my
dick. I knew she was happy doing this, and I also knew that a happy Haley
was a Good Thing that paid dividends.  I curled upward to envelope one of
her nipples with my mouth.  She dropped a hand behind my head to hold me
there, a sign that this was something she wanted.  I kept after her hard
little nipple with sucks and light nibbles that I knew would make her
happy.

   She released my head and I fell backward onto my pillow.  She leaned
forward from sitting almost vertical and placed her hands on my chest,
supporting herself at an angle with extended arms.  Eyes closed.  Biting
her bottom lip.  Nostrils flaring.  Wait for it.  Wait.  And then "Nnnnnnn.
Bill!  Nnnnnn!.  Ahhhhh!" My Haley was coming, rubbing herself to orgasm on
my dick.  "Nnnnnnn... ohgodohgodohgod!  Hahhhhhhhhh!" Her body shuddered
and the bold motions of her hips turned to little wiggles and she pushed
her clit on my dick to prolong her climax.  Finally she fell on top of me
into my waiting arms and I held her against me and kissed the top of her
sweet-smelling head.  "mmmmmm.  I love you, Bill...."

   We drifted together for a while in sweet embrace, the only movement from
her was her breathing, and me caressing her magical body with my hands. 
Finally, a deep breath.  "Bill?"

   "Yes, baby?"

   "You know, I've been reading in history an' stuff."

   "Yeah?"

   "I was reading how it used to be that they thought a girl was old enough
to get married once she started having her periods."

   "Yeah, I know, baby.  That's the way it was a long time ago.  Still is,
in some countries."

   "I have periods."

   "I know.  I'm the guy who has to go buy tampons, remember?"

   "Can we get married?"

   I wasn't too surprised.  After all, how much of a leap was it in her
mind from "I love you" to "I love you forever" to "Let's get married."?

   "Sweetie," I said, "not in this country.  First, with your parents'
consent, in this state you STILL have to be seventeen.  And second, I'm the
one who'd have to give consent, and I don't think they'll let me consent to
you marrying me."

   "Oh." She took a breath while she thought.  "That sucks."

   "That's the way it is.  Keeps some groups from forcing children to marry
old men and stuff."

   "Oh.  But even if I WANT to marry you?"

   "The state says that when you're thirteen, you're not mature enough to
decide that."

   "Do you think I'm mature enough?  To decide, I mean?"

   "Most of the time I do.  I guess I'm not supposed to, but I think so.  I
just worry that one day you're gonna be walking into class and some boy
your age is gonna catch your eye and I'm gonna go from the love of your
life to the old guy whose house you live at."

   "Oh, Bill," she cried, "That's NEVER gonna happen.  Never."

   "Okay," I answered.  "I believe you.  You're kind of everything in my
life, you know.  I love you, little one." I kissed the top of her head and
was rewarded with a sensuous wiggle.

   "So we can't get married," she said, "right now."

   I caught onto the "right now" and filed it into my "one day" stack. 
"No, baby, we can't, I'm afraid."

   "If we could, would you?  I mean, really?"

   I thought for the briefest of time about other options, going back to
searching and chasing women my own age and finding enough baggage with each
of them to load a truck, and I reflected on this wondrous little creature
laying on my chest, innocent, perfect, and by her own admission, mine. 
"Yes, Haley, I do believe I would.  I would."

   This rewarded me with yet another wiggle.  She turned her face toward
me. "So, another thing I learned..."

   "What?"

   "In the olden days, people didn't have to go to a church or a judge to
be married.  They just said they're married."

   "Yeah, I know about that, too.  They'd announce to the community that
they were married and everybody accepted it.  Sometimes when a preacher or
a judge came around, they'd make it official.  Sometimes not."

   "Yeah.  I read that.  We could do that."

   "What?  If we announced we were married tomorrow, I'd be in jail before
sundown and you'd be in a home for unfortunate girls.  I'd go to prison,
and I could NEVER see you again."

   "I don't mean we tell anybody else.  We tell each other.  Like now." She
gazed directly into my eyes.  I read her thoughts.  More, though, I think I
read her heart.

   "Haley, I, Bill, make you my beloved wife from now until the end of
time."

   Her smile was sublime and love filled her eyes.  "I, Haley, take you,
Bill, to be my husband from now until the end of time." She kissed me to
seal our vow.

   "But we can't tell the world.  I want to.  That sucks." She grinned. 
"But then, so do I." She giggled.  How about our first married fuck?"

   "Haley!" I chided, "Stop using that word.  It's NOT nice."

   She laughed.  "It fits sometimes.  I mean, sometimes, like, we make love
and it's soft and sweet an' stuff, an' sometimes I just want to get you in
me an' make us both come our brains out, an' I think THAT'S fucking, but
it's okay for you an' me to fuck sometimes, because the other times we make
love, okay?"

   "But," I sad, "since we're married, don't you think our first one should
be making love?"

   "Yeah, okay, husband," and she smiled and kissed me.  "I'm ready." She
rolled off me and onto her side, facing me.  Her hand immediately went to
my dick, grasping lightly, expertly, sliding the skin up and down my shaft.

   "Mmmmmm," I said, "you know exactly how to touch me."

   "'cause this is MINE," she said.  In a quick twist her mouth was on my
dick and her tongue was swirling over the head.  It was her turn to go
"Mmmmm." Breathe.  "I love your dick in my mouth." Suck.  "Mmmmm."

   "I wanna taste you, Haley." This brought me a little pussy in my face as
she sat back to let my tongue penetrate her moist lips.  "Mmmmmm."

   "I feel that all the way to my toes," she gasped.

   "So you tell me." She did.  Almost every time.  And I found that if I
lowered the frequency of my moans, she felt it even better.  So I dropped
an octave.  "Mmmmmmmm."

   "Ahhhh, Bill!" She flipped around and I stared up her naked body to her
face looking down at me.  Two hands gripped my head, pulling me face-first
into her moist pussy.  I lapped and sucked happily as she spasmed. 
"Mmmnnnnnnn!  Oh.  Bill!  Right.  There!"

   I knew exactly where "there" was and my tongue curved to cup the shaft
of her little clit and I sucked it into my mouth.

   "Nnnnn.  Yes.  Ohgodohgodogod!  Ahhhhhhh!  Billll!  I'm.  comingggggg!"
And she did.  She didn't gush juice.  It just FLOWED.  And I drank.  I
didn't get it all.

   Her next move was turn around and a slide down my chest where her wet
pussy met the head of my dick and slid right over it, enveloping me in
incredible warmth and wetness.  She looked at me with love and lust and
started pumping me in and out of her.  Her motions were more back and
forth, and I added the up and down component instinctively.

   She arched her back to bring her clit to bear at the base of my dick on
each stroke.  "Nnnnn.  Bill!  Do.  Me.  Hard.  Nnnn."

   "Ohhhhh, my sweet Haley baby.  I'm close."

   "Do.  Me.  Hard." I did.  As our pelvises met, I could feel the push of
her cervix against the head of my dick.  I was that deep.  Or I was
perfectly matched for the angelic form working me over in lust. 
"Nnnnnnghhhh!" Push.  Twist.  Nnnnnnngghh!  Ohgodohgodohgodohgod! 
Babyyyyyyy!  Auugghhhh!"

   The last was almost a scream as she rammed her pussy down over my dick.
I exploded.  "Mmmmmmm...gaahhhhh!  Haley!  Ngghhhh!" Squirt!  "Ngghhh!" I
augmented each successive spurt with a hip thrust.  Not a big one, just a
small one, and I felt her pussy walls rippling and milking me dry.

   Her own climax passed and she collapsed into my arms, burying her face
into my chest.  "Mmmmm, honey, I LIKE being married...."

   I kissed my angel.  "Me, too, angel.  I love you."

   "Mmmmm.  I love you too." Her hand slipped between us.  "We've got a
mess, lover." She moved.  "I can take care of MY part." She slid around and
began sucking and lapping our combined juices off my dick and balls where
it had flowed out of us.  She simultaneously presented me with the sopping
pussy that minutes before had been the center of the entire universe.  We
both had fun cleaning up.  It was better than wet sheets or a harsh towel.
Finally she turned around and kissed and licked the remnants off my face.

   Finally we lay on our sides facing each other.  I slowly ran my hand
down her back, feeling, caressing, DREAMING her body with my fingertips.

   Two days later we again faced that `period' thing for the first time
since she'd moved in.  Haley became a little more emotional than her normal
levelheadedness.  I think she studied harder, but I could be wrong.  My
Haley was an "A" student.  And she worried about me.

   "I'm like, BROKEN," she said, the first time she had a period while
living with me.  "I can't DO anything."

   "Oh, don't worry, honey," I said.  I can live without THAT.  I just
can't live without YOU.  You can still hug."

   She hugged.

   "And some people do it even when the girl is on her period."

   "Yuck, no way."

   So I scratched "doing it during her period" off my list."I was just
offering, Sweetie," I said.  "It's not particularly pleasant for the guy,
either."

   "You've done it with a girl having a period?" she looked at me.

   "Yeah," I answered.  "A couple of times.  It's messy."

   "Did you come?"

   "Yeah.  But it's not something that I HAVE to do, you know."

   "Hmmm," she said.  "I just think it would be yucky.  But if you REALLY
need to be inside me."

   "Sweetie," I said, "this is US.  I want to be inside you because it's
YOU and what YOU want.  If you don't want something, I'm not going to twist
your arm."

   This got me a hug and a kiss.  She smiled.  "But my mouth and hands
still work."

   "Sweetie," I said, "That would be selfish of me."

   "How?  D'ya think I don't LIKE sucking you?  `Cause I do, you know.  A
lot."

   "But you don't come."

   "So you'll OWE me.  I like it when you pay me back." She giggled.

   We bathed separately that night.  When I left the bathroom I found her
kneeling in the middle of the bed wearing nothing but her panties.

   "You know, I was thinking..."

   "What were you thinking?"

   "I was thinking that I never saw your stuff come out.  You told me that
you could do that with your hand or I could do that with my hand.  I wanna
do that to you."

   "Seriously?"

   "Seriously!  Lay down." She pushed me backwards onto the bed then sat on
my legs with her hands on my dick and smiled.  "I can still suck you, too,
but I wanna watch it come out." She slid down my legs and my dick
disappeared into the heaven that is her mouth.  I caressed the curly brown
head pleasuring me.

   "Mmmmmm!  I do love your mouth."

   "My mouth loves your dick.  All of me loves all of you." She sat back, a
purposeful look on her face.  "So!" she said, "How do we do this?"

   "Baby, you don't need lessons.  You get me close all the time with those
hands.  Just stroke it like you do." She gripped me lightly and began to
slide her hand and my skin up and down.  "Like that!  Ooooohhhh!"

   She stroked me with her right hand, her left kneading and tugging at my
sack, my balls moving easily beneath her fingers.  The feeling was
exquisite.  Occasionally her right hand moved to the head and swirled over
it.  Pre-cum oozed and she smeared the head and swirled some more.  And
kept jacking.  My pelvis began to surge rhythmically, uncontrollable.

   "My Bill's dick is HAPPY," she teased.  "He's rockin'." She kept on.

   "Nnnnnngghh!  Haley!"

   "Look at all the JUICE!" The head of my dick was flooding pre-cum.  It
was flowing down the shaft where it slicked her hand, further intensifying
the feelings.  "Come for me, Bill!"

   My hips rose off the bed to engage her hands.  "Oooohhhhh!  Haley!  My
baby!  Mmmmm...oooowwww!" The first spurt of semen must've gone three feet
straight up.  "NNNNNNNNGGHHHH!  The second landed on my chest.

   She was laughing with glee.  "Look at THAT!" She felt the pulsations of
my dick and timed her strokes.  The third leapt out and landed on my belly,
then successive strokes made a fountain of thick semen flow down my dick
and over her fingers.  "Look at all that!" She released my dick and her
cum-covered fingers went to her waiting mouth.  "There's so much!  I had no
idea!  No wonder I have to swallow so many times."

   I was still in another universe when she decided to drink up the semen
all over my belly and dick and balls.  Soft lips and tongue sucked and
licked me clean.  She sat back on her knees.  "You owe me one," she
announced.

   By the time her period was over, I owed her six.

   Life became almost idyllic.  I don't know of many people who became so
compatible living under the same roof, but we were.  Household chores we
shared.  I did the heavy, nasty things, and if I was tired, hot and sweaty,
she knew it and met me with a cold drink and then paid extra attention to
me in the bath.  It was great.

   She finished out her school year on the honors list.

   We slept blissfully, happily together, getting used to each other in bed
at night and the most wonderful times of all were waking up together on
mornings when school or work didn't call us.  Magic was how I felt waking
up with the sun starting to glow in the window, seeing her little form
molded against me still asleep.  Sometimes I watched her for an hour,
waiting for the first stirrings of her awakening, then kissed her to
consciousness.

   If she woke up first, well, I don't know if she laid in bed staring at
me, but I do know that having a warm, happy mouth sucking on my dick is a
great way to enter a day.  Matter of fact, we often spent the first five
minutes after the alarm went off in a sweet sixty-nine.  And more than a
few days had me off to work with a drained dick.  My little lover knew what
it was like to go to school with the last drops of come dripping into her
panties, too.

   The weekends my daughter Deena came over, though, Haley was good little
adopted daughter, attentive, obedient, proper.  And when I brought Deena
home, Haley always rode in the back seat.  After Deena was left at her
mom's, though, Haley was in the front seat and as soon as we hit the
highway, she delighted in pulling my dick out to play naughtily.

   One time, though, instead of her usual jeans or shorts, she was wearing
a skirt.  When I left Deena at her mom's, Haley hopped into the front seat
beside me and stripped her panties out from under her skirt.

   As we drove, she captured my hand and guided it to her moistening pussy.
"I miss you, ya know."

   I looked at her.  "Me, too, little love." I slowly massaged her pussy.
She fought briefly with my fly and won.  Her hand was on my dick, stroking
its hard shaft.  She slid sideways away from me and her head bobbed between
my stomach and the steering wheel and she sucked me.  "Mmmmmmm!" I said. 
"Stop that!  I'm gonna drive off the road!"

   She sat up and giggled.  "hee-hee!  Pull in that rest stop up ahead."

   It was almost empty and we pulled in the empty back row.  "Slide over
here," she commanded.  I slid.

   "Pull your pants down.  I don't want your zipper to hurt me." I raised
my ass and slid my pants down, freeing my dick.  She straddled me, facing
me and impaled herself on my erection.  Her eyes twinkled.  "I know you're
nervous.  Quickie, okay?"

   I had a thirteen year old girl speared on my dick in a public place and
I had no more control than a falling leaf.  "Okay," I gasped.  She kissed
me full on the lips, our tongues meeting, and her hips were off to the
races.

   "This is for you, baby," she said, then she started working her ass in
earnest.

   "Ahhh, baby," I threw my head back.  "Mmmm.  Mmmm.  Mmmm."

   She was working it.  And it got to her.  "Nnnn.  Oh, Bill.  Nnnn.  We're
gonna do it.  Mmmm.  Ohhhh." Wet slurping sounds came from our junction. 
"Ohh.  Unnnhhh.  Bill.  I'm.  Coming!"

   I met her spasm with one of my own.  As she rode her climax, I spurted
jet after jet of hot come into her.  Finally we untangled and she grabbed a
handful of tissues to sop up the ooze of our juices from her pussy.  I
struggled to pull up my own pants and I don't think I was really seeing
straight when we pulled out of the rest stop and back on the road.

   "So, lover," she asked, "What are we gonna do when Deena comes to stay
for two weeks this summer?"

   I thought about that for a short time, all the while caressing her neck
as we drove.

   "I don't know," I said.  "There's no way we could even begin to get away
with her finding out.  Not until you're seventeen."

   Haley snorted, "An' I don't think she would keep a secret if she did
find out."

   "Nope," I said.  "She tells her mom everything that goes on while she's
here.  I get to hear it thrown back at me all the time." Deena's mom, my
ex, liked to blame me for everything that ever went wrong on the planet.