Does size matter? That's the question guys everywhere are asking, but the very fact that they're asking reveals, in more ways than one, that it definitely does. It reveals that they are lacking the one thing that is truly required to satisfy any partner, every time.

When discussing whether or not size matters, the place to start is considering what penile penetration actually feels like for a woman in the first place. It's a complete mystery to 99% of guys out there, and I actually had to search far and wide, asking dozens of women, to figure it out for myself. I searched it out from an academic standpoint, so that I could improve the realism of my erotic fiction. Don't believe what the porn stories tell you about what penetration feels like, especially those written by young men. The truth of it is actually way more interesting.

A girl's pussy is essentially a highly sensitive muscular ring, beneath some very tender membrane that makes up the vaginal walls. It's these muscles that define the tightness or looseness of a girl's vagina; they can get out of shape just like any other muscle, or be in perfect shape, enhancing the pleasure for both the man and the woman. When the penis enters, it stretches these muscles, depending on the size of it, a little, or a lot. We all know what it feels like to stretch our muscles. It can be a mixture of pain and pleasure at the same time if we're not used to it, and if we are used to it, it's mostly pleasure. When the penis penetrates, it stretches some of the most sensitive muscles in the woman's entire body, giving her a nice stretchy "full" feeling. Others say it feels kind of like a nice slippery massage on a bundle of nice tingling sexual nerve endings. This, most women say, is why bigger is better.

In some cases, the woman's muscles won't stretch at all, and the guy can't even get himself inside her. Gentle massaging with the fingers will loosen the muscles a bit over time, but it will still be painful, so be extremely careful. Oh yeah, and use lots of lubricant too. If she's not naturally wet enough, the thin membranes of her pussy walls tear easily. This apparently hurts like hell and takes a while to heal. This is why rape is a usually physically horrible experience for women.

The hymen is another mystery, speaking of penetration. It's there simply to be ripped open by a penis; doctors have no other explanation for it. It's a membrane stretched partially across the opening of the vagina. It has some small openings in it, for menstrual flow to pass through, or perhaps it is one big opening - a tight ring of membrane around the vaginal opening. Large openings or small though, for the most part it must be torn by the penis in order for full penetration (i.e. actual fucking) to occur. It can be partially or fully ripped open before a girl's first sex by physical activity, tampon use, or even masturbation, or in some case, it was never there to begin with.

When a girl is first penetrated, when the hymen is ripped through, or simply stretched open a little more, depending on the guy's size and the type of hymen she has, she may feel little more than a slight pinch, burning, or stinging. If the hymen covers over most of the opening, with only a few small perforations, there may be more pain as more tissue has to be ripped through. There may be a little blood, but not usually a lot. If the guy is huge, the majority of the pain comes from the stretching of the muscles and vaginal membrane, as opposed to the ripping of the "cherry" itself.

Having looked at the invasion of a young man's cock from a young lady's point of view, we turn our attention back to the question at hand - does size matter? It's a question that's been debated for decades, and perhaps centuries behind closed doors, among those who had the opportunity to sample more than a single penis in their life time.

The answer is yes, size does matter. Sorry guys. It's apparently true, according to almost every woman I've talked to. It matters a great deal in fact, they say, but only in terms of effort required to please. All men can please a woman with proper technique and attention, but if a guy's got a big fat dick, he basically just has to "show up" and the woman gets off. This is perhaps why other men envy them. A "lesser man" can please any woman of course, but he actually has to put in some effort. A well-hung stud generally requires less fancy tricks. A bigger cock is more physically, visually, and psychologically appealing. This is the consistent consensus of the women I've informally polled about it.

"Of course size matters," one gal announced in a late-night sex show interview. "Women who say it doesn't never had a nice big dick." Other women flat-out disagree, touting the old cliché about the size of the rod and the wriggling of the worm. The difference between these two camps seems to be the emphasis on raw animalistic pleasure, and a more intimate focus on the sensuality of the overall sexual experience. A well-sized male member is a treat in either case.

On a psychological level a big rod waving in a girl's face gives a sense of male power and authority, and this is an incredible turn on for both partners for genetic and biological reasons. I'll discuss this turn-on more fully later on.

This is not to say all guys should be massive though. A really big dick can hurt (in a bad way) and even injure a woman, so care is required. Don't ram her unless she asks to be rammed. Some women do enjoy a good hard pounding by a massive cock; but most don't. Make sure she's wet enough before you begin too, and no, just seeing your monster hard-on is not usually enough to flood her sexual engine, in spite of porn story rhetoric.

A small dick is okay, women say, but not by itself. The majority of the female's sexually excitable nerve endings are in the outer inch of her vagina, around the opening, so even a two-inch dick can get her off if used right. No matter what the size of your member, you've got to know how to use it, and how to complement it with other moves from your hands, mouth, body, and vocals, and words, if it happens to be less than massive, or even less than average.

The other side of the coin is that, like penises, vaginas come in all depths and sizes too. A girl's pussy is only about three to six inches deep, so anything more than that is going to waste anyway with the average woman.

"It's the thickness that matters, more than the length," one lady friend told me. I tend to agree with her. Ever seen a porn flick where the guy has a massive member, but can't even get it all the way in? Looks kind of frustrating, doesn't it? Thicker means tighter, and tighter means more pleasure for both partners - more stimulation.

Size matters to both sexes. Guys generally prefer a tighter pussy. So ladies, before you go laughing at an inferior little fellow's manhood, check out your own back yard. If there's an echo down there when the guy talks while eating you out, you've don't have much to laugh about yourself. (He: "That's the biggest pussy I've ever seen... ever seen..." She: "You didn't have to say it twice!" He: "I didn't!") The appeal of a tighter pussy is both physical and psychological. Physically there's more sensation, more pleasure, without even moving. The slightest little movement is ecstasy inside a snug little snatch. Psychologically, a gal with a tighter pussy is perceived as somewhat virginal, and that's a turn-on for guys as well, perhaps contributing to the whole teen porn industry. The idea that a guy is the first, or one of the first inside a gal brings out his inner conqueror. A cavernous young lady on the other hand, is perceived, whether it's true or not, to have been around the block a few times. She better know a few tricks or she's not likely to be called the next day, or even woken up when the guy sneaks off.

One woman in a chat room I was in once said that "size only matters to a woman with a pussy the size of a garage." There is a lot of truth to that; a woman with an extremely small vagina won't enjoy a big cock at all, while a gal with a bigger vagina naturally needs a bigger cock to get her off. She'll barely even feel anything less, especially if she's soaking wet. The guy won't feel much either, so it's a relationship with problems to begin with.

One of the keys to partner selection and long-term sexual fulfilment therefore is a comfortably matched set of parts. Tiny vaginas can stretch over time though, and looser vaginas can be toned up with Kegel exercises and Ben Wah balls to become more snug, so all hope is not lost if two lovers are mismatched in the beginning. Penis size can only be changed with expensive surgery though. Don't get suckered into some gimmicky penis enhancement product some scumbag spammer sent you. You can't change your genetics.

Size is of course a factor in oral sex as well. It's much easier for a girl to go down on a smaller cock than a great big jaw-wrenching monster. This is the one area where smaller guys are on equal or better ground than bigger guys. A talented girl can suck either dick equally well, but a less experienced lady would probably prefer blowing the lesser man. Of course not being a woman myself, I can only venture a guess as to whether this is actually true. Logic suggests that it is

All academic discussion aside, if you fail to please a gal with your smaller-sized penis, (and you're not a millionaire with a Porsche) you'll most likely get the brush off when you ask for a rematch. You might get dumped eventually too, by a consistently unsatisfied girlfriend, especially if she's had larger men in the past. (Don't give her the third degree about her ex's cocks though; women hate being put on the spot and having to lie to spare your feelings. Plus it smacks of insecurity, as I discuss below.)

If you are cursed with a smaller penis, never be lazy or complacent about her pleasure, or she'll be wandering away to greener pastures and telling you some shit about "not wanting to be tied down in a relationship" or something, and you'll turn into the kind of shrimpy-cocked woman-hater that feminists rant about. It's sad but it's true. If you've got a little dick, go all out in compensating for it in other ways. Don't give her any reason to have to fake it. Women hate having to fake anything.

The other area where size is important is in the issue of premature ejaculation. An extremely tight girl is going to have struggles with guys who find her too stimulating for her own good. A beautifully snug vagina can be overwhelming for some, causing them to blow off in less than a dozen strokes, long before she has even begun to get warmed up. It's happened to us all at one time or another and it's terribly embarrassing and frustrating for both partners. On the other hand, some guys have trouble lasting in any vagina.

The best way of dealing with this problem is simply through practice. Have lots of sex (or masturbation) and work on toning up your pubococcygeus muscles - the muscles used to hold back a piss. When the orgasm approaches simply relax the pace a bit (if you can) and lock in the ejaculation with an intense squeezing of your internal muscles. In time you'll be able to go all night if need be. Others suggest masturbating before sex, or wearing doubly thick condoms. This works too, but it kills a lot of the sensation for you. More important than these physical techniques is the development sexual confidence - not being overwhelmed by your very sexy partner as she bucks wildly up and down beneath you, dragging your cock around inside her deliciously wet little snatch. Think of yourself as an active and sexy partner - not desperately hanging on for the dear life - and you'll do much better. Think of yourself as being as sexy to her, as she is to you (she is fucking you after all) and you'll be more psychologically in control.

Be sure you are ready to go two, three, or more times if premature ejaculation is a problem for you. Spend lots of time getting her off before you even begin. When it does happen, like in an impromptu blowjob situation in the doorway of her apartment as you kiss her goodnight, and you find yourself coming inside of 20 seconds for example, don't make a big deal out of it. Insecurity is not sexy.

Remember ultimately, that sex for the vast majority of women most of the time, is not about simply getting off, screaming like a banshee, coming hot and hard, and thrashing around like a drowning fish. It is occasionally a nice treat, (more frequently for younger women who've never had a truly exception lover), but for more experienced women great sex is all about the sensual experience as a whole -- sights, sounds, scents, tastes, touches, motions, emotions, words, passions. If you get all these things going for her, she'll find it easier to forget about the 10-inch stud she had once, who just pounded the shit out of her like an arrogant brute and left her sore for three days.

You must also remember that a woman's whole body is a sex organ when she's aroused; it's not just about her pussy. Just because your sexual excitement and pleasure comes 95% from your dick, doesn't mean hers does too. Women are blessed with both internal and external sex organs between their legs, when all we have is a dick and balls. Besides this there is also her breasts, her ass, her neck, her ears, her thighs, her tummy, her hands, her lips, her hair, her feet - all of these things and more can be stimulated to great satisfaction in a woman, and this stimulation is satisfying and pleasurable whether she "comes" or not.

This is not to say that her orgasm isn't important. It's extremely important. What I'm saying is, there's more than one path to get there. Women enjoy sexual touches and caresses just for the sake of it. Men's pleasure is more fixated around their penises, their scrotums, and the goal of orgasm. It's tragically unfair, but what's worse, it leads young men (and even some inexperienced young women) to assume that women are the same way; they focus all their attention on the vagina and clitoris, and neglect the dozen other hot buttons of sexuality on a gal's physique that they could use to turn her into a shuddering mass of orgasmic goo. This misconception also leads guys (and some young women) to obsess about penis size, thinking it's all about filling the pussy nice and "stretchy" and tight, and getting her off quickly and heavily. Women like to enjoy the journey, as much as the destination. Penis size doesn't matter nearly as much when you think of yourself as fucking her entire body, from head to toe.

Talk to your lady. Ask her what she likes and give her lots of it. Pay close attention to her reactions to everything you do during love making. If she's too embarrassed to tell you outright what she likes, as younger women often are, you've just gotta pay more attention as you go. Every woman is different too - it's not just a cliché, it's true; what pleases one girl, may not work with another. As I said earlier though, there's one universal factor that women across the board attest too: a guy with a big thick dick pretty much just has to show up and put it in, and she's loving life. If he's got a big thick noggin to match though, he'll never be more than a dispensable fuck toy for the more discerning lady.

Taking care of your woman outside the bedroom, treating her like a lady, and making her feel secure goes a long way to compensating for a smaller-sized dick as well. The more mature a woman gets the more she learns to appreciate the "real men" of the world, and she eventually regards the hot young assholes she pursued in her youth with distain. She learns to appreciate the good men out there, but is usually hard pressed to find one by then, after making her way through a long train of more attractive (and possibly well-hung) but arrogant assholes. "A hard man is good to find," young ladies say, but it eventually turns into "a good man is hard to find" in the end, when she begins to recognize the self-centered jerks of the world more and more.

When it comes to ego, size matters too. Young girls get bamboozled by these arrogant young pricks because they mistake their arrogance for self-confidence, which is inherently attractive to all women. This is part of the reason why young girls go after the bad boys of the world. The confidence is attractive and the arrogance is exciting. More mature women know better though: the bad boys of their youth turned out to be more interested in themselves and their own dicks than in them, and that's not attractive or exciting at all. Young women, if you've never had a big dick and are wandering in your fantasy life to greener penile pastures, let me assure you that a guy with a big dick is not worth throwing away a guy with a big heart over. Get a dildo if you're curious, and keep the good man.

As I said earlier, guys, obsessing about whether or not size matters, interrogating your girlfriend about her ex's dick size and such, smacks of ugly insecurity. It will slowly kill her attraction for you and will continually remind her that there was someone else bigger than you in her past. Don't do it. It'll be hell for both of you. If you're that worried about your penis size, you've got bigger problems in the love department than a little dick.

The most important thing of all, the ultimate aphrodisiac, the ultimate compensation for a smaller penis, is confidence. No matter how handsome you are, or how big or little your dick is, confidence is the be all and end all of turn-ons for a woman. Outward appearances or flaws don't matter, it's about attitude. Don't be fooled by the hot-looking stud that seems to have all the ladies swooning over him. If he's a scared little boy deep down inside, putting on a phoney front of cockiness, he's got nothing. He's doomed to be lonely forever because he no doubt takes his insecurities out on the women in his life, thinking he can always move on to the next dumb slut who comes along if this one refuses to be his emotional punching bag, cum depository, and surrogate mommy.

Be confident; be a man -- not conceited or self-centered - be self-assured. If you show her that you've got a back bone, without being an asshole about it, she's sure to get weak in the knees and wet as a waterslide just being in the same room with you. She can't help it; it's in her genes. Women want to be with the strongest possible males they can find, to ensure they have the strongest possible children - it's survival of the species. Strong confident men, who are caring and attentive, win every time.

This is also why powerful men are a turn-on for many women. Cops, soldiers, political leaders, celebrities, teachers, bosses, rock stars, priests, and sometimes even their own fathers can make a girl wet and willing just being around them. It's all about strength, confidence, self-assurance; it's all about a girl's biological attraction to the alpha male.

This is explains why many women like to be "taken" by their men - simply overpowered, psychologically or otherwise, and fucked, hard and deep by a man they are attracted to. Some women even develop rape or gangbang fantasies if this obsession goes too far. A girl's self-esteem has a lot to do with these issues though. Self-confident women are not likely to be aroused by being treated like trash. They're more likely to be completely repulsed by such situations. Women with lower self-confidence and sexual standards may be considered attractive to some men, in an I-want-to-come-right-fucking-now kind of way, but in the long run the women with confidence and self-assurance are the truly sexy ones.

To the more mature reading this, this probably seems like stuff you already know, but the younger people out there are still scrambling to figure it all out. If someone had told me these things when I was 12 years-old my life would be very different. I might have married my high-school sweetheart and lived happily ever after. I'm happy now, but it's been a long hard lonely road getting here.

The conclusion of the argument therefore is this: size is a bonus when it comes to raw mindless sexual satisfaction, but it's not the only thing that matters. A lover who's attentive, self-assured, and knows a few tricks can satisfy any partner anytime, and a guy who's confident, self-assured, and truly loves his lady in a proactive way will go a lot farther in the long run than the guy who simply shows up with a big 10-inch rod.

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